


Cause I'll Be Loving You (Always)

by kaceywithak



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Different chapters for different POV, Found Family, Full House AU, Like you guys will actually be going crazy with the slow burn, Lots of fluff and hugs but also feelings, M/M, Slow Burn, Thank you Stevie Wonder and Joe Cocker for being the soundtrack to this, The frogs are doing their best to raise 3 little girls, dead parents :(
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-26
Updated: 2017-02-09
Packaged: 2018-09-02 10:52:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 22,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8664847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaceywithak/pseuds/kaceywithak
Summary: Dex had a plan for his life. That plan did not include raising his three youngest sisters with his two best friends.  But when his parents die in an accident two weeks after graduation, he learns life doesn't care about your plans and all you can do it learn to go with it. With the help of their old hockey team, Stevie Wonder and Disney movies, The Frogs learn to navigate a year of raising kids. (Or, the Full House AU that has kept me up for six weeks. AKA Frog House.)





	1. Part 1: Dex

_This AU has completely taken over my life for the past six weeks and I am incredibly excited to share it with you!! The chapter line up looks as follow:_

_1) Dex (August and September)_  
_2) Nursey (October and November)_  
_3) Chowder (December)_  
_4) Nursey (Winter)_  
_5) Dex (Spring)_

_Basically, Dex's parents had him when they were very young and waited awhile to bless him with sisters: Hayley (age 7), Julia (age 5) and Emma (age 1). They are a loveable bunch but also a HANDFUL. Much like the Frogs themselves._

_Disclaimer: I do not own Check Please, but I'm convinced I am actually the secret child of Shitty and Holster._

 

**Part 1: Dex (August and September)**

The last picture he has of the Poindexter family was from his graduation day. 

His father stands to his left with an arm around his shoulders, beaming with pride. In front of him stands Hayley, Dex’s seven-year-old sister with hair as red as his and a smile brighter than anyone he knows.

Dex holds Julia: the middle sister who was delighted to get a new dress for the occasion. Her small arms are wrapped around Dex’s neck and he remembers thinking she had a pretty good grip for a five-year-old. 

His mother stands on the other side of him and she’s on the verge of tears. He was the first in his family to graduate college and it was an emotional day for everyone. His youngest sister, Emma, sleeps in his mother’s arms. The baby of the family just celebrated her first birthday.

Dex remembers everything about taking that picture: in the midst of the chaos and cheers and disbelief of graduation day, they managed to have a moment where they all stood together. Dex could not believe that college was over, but he was so excited for what came next. His plan included a move to Boston, a job at a fancy engineering firm and a trip home one weekend a month to see his sisters. 

Two weeks later, everything changed.

\--

_August 2018_

“Are you really sure about this William?”

“Yes, Gran.” He knows she’s worried and she probably has a very good reason to be, but it doesn’t change the fact that she has asked the same question at least ten times that day alone. He shifts Emma to his other hip and she starts to tug on the collar of his shirt.

“I know they are your friends…”

“Gran, it’s going to be alright. I have a plan.” And he does. It’s a very shaky plan where at least a thousand things could go wrong…but it’s a plan.

He took a job at a small electrical engineering firm in Providence that promised a work-life balance and a good health insurance. He put his childhood home in Maine up for sale and used the money to buy a small house in Pawtucket. 

Chowder signed with the Falconers and was planning to crash with Jack and Bitty until training camp was over anyway, so it made sense for him to move in. Chowder loves the girls and assured Dex he would be way too lonely living on his own after three years in the Haus.

Nursey was a different story. He graduated with a degree in English and had vague plans to move back to New York, but the minute he heard about the Poindexter parents, he drove up to Maine and stayed the whole summer. He helped with the funeral, decisions about Dex’s job, house hunting in Providence, packing up the house, keeping the girls busy…when he offered to move in for a few weeks until things could settle, Dex couldn’t imagine turning him down.

“It’s just, you’re so _young_ William.” Her hand comes up to his face and he closes his eyes for a second. He doesn’t feel young. “And I know you love your sisters but when they named you guardian your parents couldn’t have possibly known it would happen this soon.”

“I know, Gran. But I _am_ the guardian and their big brother _and_ I’ve got help. It’ll be fine.” He meets her stern gaze with one of his own. Stubbornness is genetic. “You’ve got gramps and Aunt Carol and her crazy kids to take care of.”

“Exactly, the girls should be surrounded by their family-“ 

“We’re in Rhode Island now.” His tone is firm and final.

It takes another hour of her double-checking everything around the house, but Gran leaves with only a few tears and requests to call twice a week. The house is quiet for only a few minutes before the front door slams open.

“Where are the three coolest girls on the East Coast?”

“ _NURSEY_!” Hayley and Julia rush to him at top speed and he crouches down to give them hugs.

“You were gone for a whole week!” Hayley frowns and he ruffles her red hair.

“Nah, barely even six days. Had to pack and tie up some loose ends.” 

“Will helped us paint our room!” Julia says excitedly. “We picked lav...lav…”

“Lavender.” Hayley finishes. “Julia left the door open and Emma almost crawled inside and knocked over a paint can. Gran went crazy.” 

“I bet.” Nursey smiles and stands back to his feet. He makes a silly face at Emma who giggles and buries her head into Dex’s neck. “You miss me Poindexter?” Dex grins: Nursey asks him that every time they spend more than a day apart. Before he can reply, the door swings open again. 

“ _CHOWDER_!” Chowder carries a huge duffle back and is nearly knocked backwards with the surprise of two girls charging at him.

“Hi girls!” He gives them big hugs and eventually stands up to pull Nursey, Dex and Emma into a group hug as well. “Bitty helped me pick out car seats for Emma and Julia and I got some for you too Nursey, they are in my trunk-“ Dex snorts.

“I don’t think car seats are going to fit in the back of Nursey’s Audi.”

“You didn’t tell him?” Chowder looks from Nursey to Dex.

“Chill C, it was a surprise.”

“What’s a surprise?” Julia bounces with excitement.

“I got a new car.” Nursey says proudly. Dex takes a few steps towards the front window and looks out: sure enough, parked behind his family’s old blue Ford Explorer is a shiny new Lincoln Navigator.

“Are you serious.” Dex thinks it’s absolutely ridiculous Nursey bought a new car when he will only be here for a few weeks.

“Like Chowder said, car seats wouldn’t fit in the Audi.”

“I like it!” Julia has to stand on her tip-toes to look out the window. “Does it have airbags?”

“Every car has airbags, Julia.”

“Not _every_ car, Hayley! The bumper cars at the fair didn’t!” 

“That’s because they are not _real_ cars!”

“You said they were! You said they were real cars and that’s why I wasn’t allowed to drive it by myself!” 

“Alright, knock it off.” Dex knows the warning signs of a fight between his sisters. Every day they found a new way to drive each other crazy. “Let’s put Emma in her playpen and then help Nursey and Chowder unpack their cars.” 

It goes as smoothly as it possibly can and Dex only has to bring out the Disney band-aids twice (one for Julia, one for Nursey). They had already moved the furniture in the week before, so it was mostly suitcases of clothes, hockey gear and video games. Jack and Bitty swing by and drop off enough food to feed them for the rest of the week and brand new monogrammed backpacks for the girls.

“They are from L.L. Bean.” Bitty tells Dex proudly. They sit on the back porch with beers and slices of pie. “Even if y’all are in a new state, the girls can carry a little bit of Maine with them.” 

“Thanks Bits.” He cheers their glasses together. Dex is glad Jack and Bitty live close: he loved his senior year of college, but he missed the blond baker and his ability to make you feel a little better about the world.

“Oh lord, I am tweeting about this.” At first Dex thinks its about Nursey chasing Hayley and Julia around the yard, the three of them pretending to be pirates. But then he follows Bitty’s gaze and has to stifle a laugh.

Jack holds Emma, who looks impossibly small wrapped in his large arms and Chowder hides behind his hands playing peek-a-boo and sending the baby into a giggle fit every time.

Dex finishes his beer and takes a deep breath. Maybe….maybe this plan could work.

\-- 

It’s nearly midnight and he has three very awake and very loud girls.

“It’s MY shirt!” Hayley yanks a yellow shirt away from Julia. “You have your own clothes!”

“I HATE hand-me-downs! I want something new!” Julia aims a kick at her sister and Nursey picks her up and walks her to the other side of the room. Dex can hear Chowder trying to calm Emma down across the hallway.

“You girls were supposed to be asleep four hours ago, what happened?” Dex looks between the two. 

“I woke up and she was going through my stuff!” Hayley folds her arms across her chest.

“You never let me look when we are awake!” Julia twists in Nursey’s arms. He tightens them slightly and shoots Dex a pleading look. 

“I don’t want to share a room with her, she’s a _thief_.” Hayley points at Julia, who immediately starts sobbing at the accusation. “Can’t you stay with her and I’ll stay with Nursey?”

It’s an argument she has tried to make since they first figured out the sleeping arrangements. The house has four bedrooms: the largest one went to Dex, the second went to Hayley and Julia to split, the third room went to Chowder and the smallest room was just enough to fit Emma’s crib, changing table and the old rocking chair Dex’s father had built before Hayley was born. Nursey was staying with Dex because “we’re already used to living together and Chow needs his sleep if he’s going to stop professional pucks all day.” 

Of course, Nursey brought a queen sized bed and Dex had a full, so there was only about six inches of space between them. He figures it’s still better than the bunk beds in the attic.

“Hayley, we’ve talked about this. You and Julia shared a room back at the old house and you are sharing one here too.”

“It’s not fair. Emma gets her own room.” Dex gives her a look and she heaves a dramatic sigh. Emma’s room is the size of a closet.

“Fine!” She turns to Julia, who is no longer crying. Instead, Julia rests her head against Nursey’s side and lets out a few dramatic sniffles when the attention is on her. If Dex didn’t have to be up for work in six hours he would find it sweeter than he currently did. “I’m sorry I called you a thief.” 

“Okay.” Julia sniffs and Nursey whispers something in her ear. “I’m…I’m sorry I tried to _borrow_ your clothes.”

“Very good apologies.” Nursey smiles approvingly between the pair and Dex tries not to roll his eyes. “Now, how about we try this bedtime thing again?” Dex gives Nurse a nod and leaves him to tucking them back in. Across the hall, Chowder bounces Emma up and down as he paces across the small room.

“Well she doesn’t sound like a banshee anymore.” Dex leans against the doorway and yawns.

“She is _loud_! Like, Holster level loud!” Dex chuckles at the comparison. He’s not wrong. “Was she okay sleeping this past week?”

“She woke up twice the first night and at least once every night since. She was sleepin’ through the night in Maine but…”

“It’s okay, she just needs to adjust.” Chowder gives him a reassuring smile. The goalie always had an uncanny ability to put Dex at ease without making him discuss his feelings. “Oh, gross!” His face scrunches up and he holds Emma inches away from him. “I think she pooed!” 

“Alright, hand her over.” Dex takes his youngest sister and is immediately hit with an offensive smell. He unbuttons the bottom flap of her onesie and lays her on the small changing table. 

“I guess I should learn how to do this.” Chowder stands a foot away from the table, still looking disgusted as the smell.

“You don’t know how to change a diaper?”

“No? I don’t think Nursey does either?” And come to think of it, Nursey was always the one to volunteer to look after the older two this summer while Dex took care of Emma. He grimaces.

“How were you guys planning on figurin’ that out when I’m at work tomorrow?”

“Improvise?” Chowder shrugs.

“Nursey, get in here.” Dex calls across the hall. He appears at the doorway. 

“Yo, that smells _nasty_.” Emma giggles and Dex bites down a grin.

“Alright, first rule is you never leave her alone on the changing table. Trust me, they roll off faster than you can blink. So you need wipes and diapers.” He looks back and forth between his best friends: Chowder looks like he is listening a hockey play, Nursey looks like he is one step from running down the hall. 

He shows them how to take the diaper off and wrap it up so it covers the used wipes and then slide and fasten the new one. Chowder repeats the instructions twice and Nursey and Dex chirp him for it.

Dex lays her down in the crib. She looks up at the three of them and gives a sleepy smile.

“Goodnight Emma!” Chowder whispers and he tucks a teddy bear next to her. Nursey lightly bumps his shoulder into Dex’s and his shoulder tingles a little. After four years, he never really got used to the tingling sensation he felt around Derek Nurse. He just learned to accept it as a constant. It’s not feelings, it’s physics.

“She’s the only one who has the same eye color as you.” Dex catches one more glimpse of Emma’s amber eyes before she falls asleep.

“Mom had those eyes.” His voice is oddly scratchy. Nursey bumps his shoulder again and this time he doesn’t move away. 

“They’re nice.”

\-- 

_September 2018_

Dex leans back in his chair and stretches his arms about his head. The architect’s notes for the project were messy and Dex could already see problems with where the lights actually should go and where the architect said they should go. 

“Let me guess, he has these lofty ideas about chandeliers that we can not possibly wire without changing the whole structure of the building.” Dex looks up from the desk to see his supervisor in the doorway. 

“Why would a company purchase an old warehouse and plan to make it ‘ _eco conscious modern lofts for the young Providencer’_ ’” he reads from the title page of the proposal and rolls his eyes, “and yet they don’t want to change anything about the 200 year old building?” 

“Because it’s _cool_ and _hip_ Poindexter.” Angie’s got her hands on her hips and shakes her head, causing a few of her dark curls to fall around her face. Dex has only been working at the firm for a month, but he knows he got the best supervisor.

“I guess. I’ve marked a few places in the plan that need reviews, but there are a few I wasn’t sure about.” He hands her the packet and she glances over it.

“Pretty good work. After lunch, come in my office and we can go over it.” Angie always let Dex take a stab at a problem or proposal first. “How are the sisters liking school?” 

“So far, so good.” He picks up a framed picture from his desk and hands it to her. Chowder has discovered a love for printing photos at the pharmacy and framing them. Dex is pretty sure he sends framed photos to the rest of the team too, to Farmer and possibly his parents back in California. “That one’s from the first day.”

“They look pretty happy.” She hands it back to him and he takes a glance. Hayley holds Emma while Julia makes sure her brand new pink dress is on full display. They are all smiling, but it’s likely because behind the camera Nursey and Chowder were making silly faces.

“Thanks.” Angie doesn’t give a compliment without meaning it. “Did City Hall end up getting their proposal in?” She makes a face.

“You just added another thing to my to do list, Poindexter.” He smiles apologetically. “See you after lunch.”

He picks his phone off of his desk after she leaves and finds a new snapchat from Nursey. It’s a picture of Emma passed out on the living room floor surrounded by a mess of toys and books with the caption “play hard, nap hard.” 

They were trying to find a day care center for Emma, but every place either had a two month long waiting list or it just didn’t feel right. To Dex’s surprise, the pickiest person was Nursey. The same boy who woke up after more than one kegster on the Haus floor with leaves in his hair would ask all of these questions about crib standards and diaper changing schedule.

_“Nope, that place sucks.” Nursey declared after leaving one of the interviews. “There are way too many kids and not enough workers. It smelled weird.”_

_“It smelled fine.” Dex rolled his eyes and reached in his back pocket for the car keys. Emma kicked her feet against his side. “Alright Em, jeez, I’ll put you down in a minute.” She had started walking the previous week and hated being picked up every since._

_“Nah man, it definitely smelled weird. And did you hear the music they were playing? That annoying kids channel? Emma hates those songs.”_

_“Sure, Nursey.”_

\--

Dex pushes the cart through the parking lot with a huff. Nursey had forgotten the shopping list when he went to the supermarket a few days before. A house of three guys in their twenties (one of them a professional hockey player) and three growing girls requires meticulous meal planning and exact lists.

Something that, apparently, only Dex finds useful. 

He is annoyed because its Wednesday night and he’s at the crowded as hell Stop and Shop because they ran out of paper towels, milk and saran wrap. He is annoyed because their printer broke at work and it’s a pain in the ass to try to decifer an architect’s handwriting through scans on the computer screen. He is annoyed because the woman in front of him and the cashier _wouldn’t stop talking._  

His phone rings as he hauls the last bag into his trunk. 

“Hello?”

_“Mr. Poindexter?”_

“Um, yes?” 

“ _This is Ms. Criswell, Hayley’s teacher. We had a little incident today at school_.” Dex stills. 

“What happened?” 

“ _The class was playing outside during recess and apparently there was an argument between Hayley and another classmate. It ended with Hayley shoving the classmate and calling her a…_ ” Dex braces himself. “ _A bitch_.”

He runs a hand through his hair and tries to control his voice as he apologizes to the teacher and promises to have a talk with his sister and there will not be a repeat of this behavior. He counts backwards from ten six different times on the drive home but he’s still fuming when he pulls into the driveway. That cool down technique only worked half the time on the ice anyway. 

He pieces together a plan of how to proceed and makes it through a quick dinner of sandwiches without blowing up, but he can see the looks Nursey and Chowder are giving him and each other. 

After dinner, he sends Julia and Emma to the living room and tells Hayley to stay seated at the kitchen table. 

“Anything happen in school today that you want to tell me about?” He sits across from her. Her hair is in two braids which means Chowder must have helped her get ready. He has a strange talent for braiding hair. 

“No.”

“No, nothing happened or no, you don’t want to tell me?” He keeps his voice even. She doesn’t break his gaze but her left leg starts to bounce up and down.

“Nothing happened.” He narrows his eyes. “It was a normal day?”

“Really? Then why did I get a call from your teacher sayin’ you swore at another kid on the playground and shoved her?” There’s a sound of dishes clattering from where Nursey is loading the dishwasher. Dex ignores this. Haley’s face starts to flush. 

“That’s not really what happened.” 

“Well then what did happen?” He’s starting to lose a little of his control. _Stay calm_ , he thinks. _The plan is to stay calm_.

“You won’t believe me.” She crosses her arms and Dex scoffs before he can think better of it.

“Might not, since you just lied to my face.”

“Carly was making fun of the way I talk!” She raises her voice to a shout and stands to her feet, moving her hands to her hips. “And the other kids were laughing and I told her to stop and she just kept making fun of me so I pushed her and…and…”

“And you called her a bitch.” Dex stands. “Hayley, I don’t even know where you learned that word!” 

“I’ve seen movies.” _When exactly did his seven-year-old sister develop the sass level of a teenager?_  

“Well I hope you enjoyed them, because you are grounded.” He points at her and her mouth drops open. Grounding was not _technically_ part of the plan, but if she’s going to fight him on this she needs consequences.

“You can’t ground me!”

“I just did!” _So much for staying calm, Poindexter._

“No you can’t, you’re not my dad!” Dex feels like the wind has been knocked out of him but Hayley continues to shout. “My dad’s not _here_!” 

“You think I don’t know that?” He’s even louder than she is. “Damnit Hayley, they were my parents too!”

A strong grip wraps around his right bicep.

“You both need to chill.” Dex turns wildly to Nursey. “C, how about you and Hayles go upstairs?” Chowder scoops her up and takes her out of the kitchen. Dex hears a sniffle and it cuts through some of the ringing in his ears, but he still feels hot and angry and _Nursey really needs to get his fucking hand off of him_. He tries to pull out of the grip.

“Let me go, Nursey.”

“You know that was almost like watching you fight yourself.” Dex glares at him but Nursey isn’t fazed. “Come on, man. I know it’s not cool she lost it at school-“

“No Nursey, it is not _cool_. It’s a goddamn mess. First the teacher calls, next I’m goin’ to get parents calling because _my_ sister taught _their_ little angel the b-word.” Nursey opens his mouth to say something and Dex cuts him off. “She’s been there for a month and now she’s _that_ kid.”

She can’t be that kid. _Dex_ was that kid, he was the one who was always getting in trouble or mouthing off when he shouldn’t have. He fought on the playground and taught the whole third grade the f-word and the only thing that ever made him shape up was hockey. “She was never like this before.” His voice is quieter but not calmer. “I mean yeah she’s got a temper, but Dad woulda…” 

He stops and closes his eyes. It all hits him at once.

“But Dad’s not here. They’re not here.” His voice cracks on the last word and he digs his fingernails into his palms to try to distract from the stinging in his eyes. “I’m in charge of making sure the girls turn out right and… _fuck_!” The tears start to fall and he hastily wipes them away with the sleeve of his dress shirt. “Fuck, Gran was right, I can’t do this-“ He lets out a sob and is immediately pulled into a hug. 

He didn’t cry when he got the call from the hospital, he didn’t cry more than a few tears at the funeral. He packed up his whole house, finding old bank statements from dad and birthday cards mom would never get to send, but each time he took a shaky breath and got through it without causing a scene.

But he cries now.

“My parents are dead, Derek.” He hates how broken he sounds. Nursey pulls him closer, gripping the back of his neck.

They stay like that for a while, Dex twisting his hand in the back of Nursey’s soft t-shirt. When Dex pulls away he sees he has left a giant stain of tears and snot the light green fabric. Gross. 

“Sorry.” He wipes his face. Nursey glances down at his soaked shoulder and shrugs. 

“It’s chill.” Dex lets out a watery laugh and Nursey clasps a strong hand on his shoulder. 

“You know we got your back through this, right?” Dex nods: he knows, but its still nice to be reminded.

“Even when I fuck up?” He means it to sound lighthearted but he knows Nursey sees right through it.

“Even then.”

\-- 

It takes Dex longer than it should to walk up the stairs and knock on the door to Chowder’s room.

“Hey.” He says softly. Hayley’s not crying anymore, but there are tear tracks down her face and his heart breaks a little. He’s never yelled at her like that before. 

“Hey.” Chowder stands up from his bed and gives him a tentative smile. Chowder always believed the best in Dex, even when he didn’t give him much to go on. Dex takes his place on the bed while Chowder leaves. 

Neither of them look at each other for a minute, they both opt to look around the decorated room. Chowder may be the back up goalie for the Falconers, but his room looks exactly like the room in the Haus: covered in Sharks gear and pictures. 

Dex takes a deep breath, reminds himself that he is the grown up, and opens his mouth.

“I’m sorry for yelling at you. I know what it feels like to lose it.” Hayley meets his gaze and her eyebrows go up in surprise. “I shoulda been more understanding.”

“I’m sorry I lied. And that I called Carly the b-word. Even though she kinda was one.” Dex bites his lip to keep from laughing.

“Well I think the only thing you can do it to apologize to Carly and your teacher tomorrow and just… try not to do it again.” He wonders if that’s good advice. He should have called Bitty before talking to her. 

“Do I _have_ to say sorry to Carly?” 

“It’s the right thing to do.” She contemplates it for a minute, but ultimately agrees. He knows he can end it here, bribe her with ice cream and discuss the terms of her grounding (which he really isn’t sure she deserves anymore), but there’s something else nagging at him. He scoots a little closer to her.

“Listen Hayley, it’s hard with mom and dad gone and living here now.” She nods slowly and he digs his thumb into his forefinger to keep his voice from cracking. “And ya know, I liked being just your older brother. But things are different now and I’m supposed to be in charge of you girls and sometimes…sometimes that means I have to lay down the rules.”

“I know.” She huffs, but it’s not out of anger. “I just miss them a lot sometimes.” 

“Me too.” Dex nods and he opens his arms. Hayley crawls into them and he pulls her tight for a hug. “I miss them a whole lot.”

“I’m happy we live with you and not Gran.” She whispers in his ear. “And Nursey and Chowder.” She pulls back and gives him one of her bright smiles and he didn’t realize how much he missed seeing those the past few months. “I like it here, Will.”

He doesn’t know what to say, so he pulls her in for another hug.

\-- 

Dex takes a long shower and lets the steam relax his tense muscles. It was already Wednesday night, which meant only two more days until the weekend and besides Hayley’s soccer game, they had a pretty free weekend. The Falconers were playing a preseason game on the road, so maybe he and Nursey could take the girls to visit Bitty at the bakery.

He takes a deep breath before turning off the water, enjoying the last few moments of quiet. The Poindexter sisters never make bedtime easy. He ties the towel around his waist and makes his way to the bedroom. 

“Yo,” Nursey is already in his pajamas and flopped across his bed. “Change quick, you have got to see the cutest thing.” Dex raises an eyebrow but pulls his pajamas from the drawer. He barely has enough time to pull and old hockey shirt on before Nursey takes his hand and leads him across the hall.

The sight melts any last tensions from his day immediately. 

Chowder is in his Shark pajamas and sits on his bed with Emma (also in shark pajamas, a gift from Chowder) in his lap. Hayley and Julia are on either side of him and all three girls are giggling as he reads “The Monster at the end of this Book”. 

“YOU TURNED THE PAGE!” Chowder’s impression of Grover is pretty accurate and his dramatics send the girls into hysterics. 

Nursey leans against Chowder’s doorway and reaches out a hand to ruffle Dex’s hair. Somehow over the years the gesture went from driving Dex up the wall to making him feel calm. 

“We’re gonna be okay, Poindexter.” He says softly as Julia turns another page of the book, sending Chowder into another tailspin. Hayley’s laughter is as loud as Emma’s squeals and Dex finds himself smiling. 

“Yeah. I think we are.”


	2. Part 2: Nursey

_I am overwhelmed by the positive response to this story! Every review has made me smile and laugh and I am so grateful to each person who read this. This chapter took a little longer to update than I planned, but on the plus side it’s about 1,000 words longer than I planned too (Nursey is a wordy one)._

_I’m hoping to have the next update up the weekend of Dec 17/18. It’s Chowder’s chapter and so far it is so much fun to write. Bless that goalie._

 

**Part 2: Nursey (October to Thanksgiving)**

_October 2018_

“Can I have chocolate chips in my pancakes?” Julia’s dark brown eyes can be as wide as Bitty’s when she wants something.

“Sure thing, Freckles.” Nursey answers easily and she scrunches her face up.

“I don’t have _that_ many freckles.” 

“You are as spotted as your brother, kiddo. Hayles, you want chocolate chips too?” Hayley looks up from her book and nods. He finds the chocolate chips and dumps half of the bag into the batter. The music coming from the Bluetooth speaker changes and Hayley looks up again and smiles.

“Can we turn this one up? It’s my favorite!”

Nursey doesn’t have a lot of music that wasn’t ‘indie hipster shit’ (Dex) or ‘appropriate for three little girls’ (Chowder), but Stevie Wonder? Nursey has all of the Stevie Wonder and he was proud to say he was rubbing off on the Poindexter girls.

“ _Oooo baby, here I am, signed, sealed, delivered, I’m yours_!” Hayley and Julia sing along and Nursey tosses each of them a wooden spoon to use as a microphone. They squeal with delight and dance around the kitchen in their pajamas.

“Dance with us, Nursey!” Julia shouts and without hesitation he grabs a spatula and joins them. He’s never been good at resisting Poindexters and living with them all hasn’t dimmed that a bit. 

“ _Oo-wee babe, you set my soul on fire_ ,” he lip-syncs into the spatula as the back door opens. “ _That’s why I know you are my only desire_ ,” Nursey looks up to see Dex walking through the door, holding Emma, with Chowder on his heels. Dex is wearing a look Nursey knows well: half exasperation, half fondness. They start up the chorus again and Nursey shrugs. Maybe he’s imagining it, but he thinks Dex’s expression tilts more towards fondness. 

“We’re having a dance party!” Julia shouts and Emma lets out a loud giggle. 

“I see that,” Dex smiles and makes a beeline for the coffee maker.  Once again, Nursey is stuck by the strange beauty that is post-workout Dex. A faint blush coloring his cheeks, hair windblown and clearly pushed back from his face by running his hand through it. A thin layer of sweat, the look of being both awake and relaxed. Nursey was sure no one looked as good as Will Poindexter after they worked out, but then again he never really paid attention to anyone else.

“How’d Emma like the new stroller?” The old stroller was a bulky mess that was a pain in the ass to close. When Nursey accidentally broke the brake for good, Dex caved and they picked out a new jogger stroller.

“I think she actually pouted when we were finished. Not as bad of a pout as Mr. NHL superstar though.” Chowder pulls off his sweatshirt and does indeed pout.

“I don’t like cardio!” He walks around the kitchen island and peers into the pancake batter. “Are those chocolate chips?”

“Sundays are special.” Nursey replies. Hayley returns to her chair and her book and Dex walks over and ruffles her hair. She swats him away and he turns to Julia.

“No way!” She starts shaking her head back and forth. “You smell!”

“I what? I what?” He wraps his arms around her and she shrieks. Hayley laughs and Dex gives her a fist bump over Julia’s mess of hair. Nursey smiles: it’s nice getting to see Dex be a big brother for once. He pours the batter onto the griddle.

“These pancakes look swawesome!” 

“What’s _swawesome_?” Hayley asks. Dex rolls his eyes as Chowder explains to the girls the origins of the word and how to use it.

“Rans and Holster will be so proud,” Dex’s voice is low and much closer to Nursey than he thought. He looks up from the griddle and smiles. 

“Hayles changed her mind again, she wants to be a hockey player instead of the little mermaid for Halloween.”

“Good thing we didn’t get their costumes then. Need any help?” Dex leans against the counter and sips his coffee.

“Depends, you feel like making bacon?”

“I feel like _eating_ bacon so, yeah, I do.” They work together in the kitchen easily, Stevie Wonder still playing softly in the background and the constant giggles from Chwoder and the girls.

As he flips the pancakes and listens to Dex hum along with the music, Nursey ponders the phrase ‘domestic bliss. 

\-- 

Mornings are always a little hectic. 

Dex is out the door by 8:00, followed closely by Chowder if he has morning practice. Dex is in charge of making sure the girls are dressed, Chowder is in charge of hair and Nursey is in charge of breakfast and getting them out of the door.

He firmly believes his job is the hardest.

“But I want Lucky Charms!” Julia whines and crosses her arms at the kitchen table. 

“I know Jules, but we don’t have those. It’s Frosted Flakes or Honey Nut Cheerios.”

“What about a poptart?” 

“Poptarts are a Friday treat.” Nursey knows Dex has this rule for a reason but he’s having a lot of trouble remembering it when Julia keeps carrying on. He glances at the clock. 8:07. “You have seven minutes until we have to walk up to the bus stop.” 

“I’m not eating then.” She crosses her arms. Nursey exchanges an exasperated look with Hayley. Though Hayley is definitely the more stubborn one, every so often Julia gets in a mood where nothing makes her happy. Nursey goes for a different tactic.

“I don’t know Julia, being hungry might make you sick. Too sick to even trick or treat tomorrow.” He shrugs his shoulders and her eyes go wide. She immediately reaches for the cereal box and pours herself a bowl of Frosted Flakes.

“Mine.” Emma reaches out from Nursey’s lap towards the box.

“Sorry squirt, you get breakfast after these two.” She looks up at him and frowns.  Emma had never gone through a meal without making a giant mess and Nursey learned early on it was best to wait until the other two were out the door.

They put on their jackets and shoes and grab their backpacks. Nursey tries everyday to get them out of the house by 8:15, but they are always a few minutes late. This usually means they are in a near-run to reach the bus stop at the top of their street. 

He waves to a few of their neighbors when they reach the corner, just as the bus pulls up and the girls give him fist bumps before climbing on after the other kids. He lets out a sigh of relief and hoists Emma a little higher on his waist.

“Made it.”

“Made it!” She repeats and he chuckles. They walk back to the house at a much more chill pace and he makes her breakfast.

\--

“Again!” Emma squeals and Nursey laughs.

“Alright,” he flips the book back to the beginning. “Five little pumpkins, sitting on a gate-“ His facetime ringtone interrupts him and he grabs his phone from on top of the coffee table. “We’re going to have to pause story time squirt, Chowder is calling.” Her face lights up and he accepts the call.

“Ow-der!” She claps her hands together when his face appears on the screen.

“Emma!” He is equally as enthusiastic. “Look who I have with me,” he tilts the phone slightly and Jack Zimmermann’s face fills the screen.

“Jack?” Emma reaches out to touch the phone and Nursey holds it up from her. She’s already put two cracks in his screen.

“Hi, Emma. And Nursey.” His voice has the same soft rumble as always.

“Thanks for noticing I’m here.”

“Oh stop, Nursey.” Chowder’s face pops back into view. “How is it going today?”

“So far, so good. Made the bus on time, spent the morning reading. But it’s almost time for an n-a-p.” He grimaces and Chowder looks sympathetic. Emma hates naps and the fact that she is teething makes it twice as tough to put her down. 

“Bitty says you guys are coming over for Halloween?” Jack asks and Nursey nods.

“After we clean out our neighborhood we are heading over. Wait til Bits sees this one’s costume.” He tickles Emma and she laughs loudly, reaching for the phone again.

“Jaaaaack. Owwwww-der.” She sings their names and both boys smile. Nursey notices the time and sighes. 

“I have to start preparing for battle.” Jack nods solemnly and Chowder gives him the salute from The Hunger Games. “Go kick Dallas’ ass tonight.”

“ _No swearing around Emma_!” Is the last thing he hears before the call disconnects. 

\--

“ _No_!” For a one year old, Emma is _loud_. 

“C’mon Em-“ 

“NO!” She shouts and smacks the side of her crib. Nursey closes his eyes. ‘ _You just have to let her cry it out sometimes._ ’ Dex tells him, as if it’s _easy_ to listen to the sound of someone’s sobs. 

“Okay,” He takes a deep breath. “Okay, I’m going to leave so you can sleep,” she starts crying and he feels his heart literally breaking. “I promise I’ll be right outside,” he turns off the light and goes out of the room. The crying and screaming gets louder and he sinks to the floor.

He sets a timer for 5 minutes to go check on her but all it takes is one “ _Nursey_!” two minutes in and he is back in the bedroom in a flash.

“Okay, okay, we’ll try something else.” He takes her from the crib and she nuzzles right into his chest and, really, what did Dex know anyway? It took Dex almost an hour to get Emma to bed the other night and Nursey just didn’t have that kind of patience today. He takes her downstairs and dims the living room lights. “Maybe we can watch a little Sports Center to calm you down.” He puts the volume on low and situates Emma so she is snuggled into his side.

“Nursey.” She sounds sleepy.

“Yeah?” He glances down, but she is already fast asleep.

Nursey is woken up by the clicking sound of a phone camera. He opens one eye and sees Ladro, iPhone held high and wearing a wicked grin.

“Hey Lards.” He looks down and sees Emma still tucked into his side, fast asleep. “How long have you been here?” 

“Long enough to send this to the group chat.” He feels vibrations from his pocket and checks his phone.

**Lardo: [image]**

**Shitty: Well fuck me that is adorable.**

**Bitty: !!!!!!!! This needs to be framed.**

**Chowder: On it!**

**Ransom: Geez Nurse, she’s got you whipped.**

**Dex: They all have him whipped.**

**Holster: #Confirmed, Nursey is the fun frog.**

**Chowder: Hey!**

**Dex: #Duh**

“Nice.” He opens the picture again and smiles. It’s actually kind of sweet. “How’s the gallery going?”

“I’ve got an intern now.” She takes a seat on the other end of the sectional couch. 

“Chill.” Emma shifts against his side and Nursey checks the time on his phone. He didn’t realize they had been asleep for over an hour.

“Domestic life looks good on you, Nursey.” Lardo never says things she doesn’t mean and the compliment warms him.

“Dex is thinking about building a porch swing for the backyard.” He does not tell Lardo that when Dex told him he immediately had flashes of them growing old together on said porch swing. He has a feeling she knows anyway. 

Emma is delighted to see Lardo when she wakes up a few minutes later and Lardo immediately scoops her up and takes her to the kitchen to color pictures. Nursey is tidying up the living room when his phone rings. 

“Yo” He answers without looking at the id.

“Is that how you answer your phone for everyone or just me.”

“M-Mom?”

“The travel agent is booking out holiday plans. Antigua for Thanksgiving, Majorca for Christmas. Will you be joining us?” Nursey stopped expecting pleasantries and small talk from his mother a decade ago, but it’s the first time they’ve spoken since August. He at least expected a ‘how are you’. 

“Nope.” He closes the lid on the Rubbermaid labeled Lincoln Logs. Dex already invited him to Thanksgiving in Maine if he wasn’t doing anything else and there was _no way_ Nursey was missing Christmas with the girls.

“Are you planning on returning to New York at all within the next six months?” Her voice is tight but Nursey reminds himself it’s not because she misses him: it’s because she wants him to start working at her company. 

“Not really.” And this was probably something he should mention to Dex. But there was an irrational, scary part of him that worried Dex was going to kick him out of the house. That he would remind Nursey he only planned to stay for a few weeks, that he was sick of sharing a room with him, that it was too crowded. So Nursey kept him mouth shut.

“Fine. If you change your mind about vacation, please speak with our travel agent.” And without much more, she hangs up.

There’s a prickling at his eyes that he hastily blinks away. He throws the phone onto the couch and walks through the swinging door into the large kitchen.

“Nursey! Duckies!” Emma holds up a piece of construction paper and he walks over, ruffling her blonde hair. Lardo drew a couple ducks and Emma colored all over the page with her large blue crayon.

“Wow, Em!” He scoops her up and sits down on the chair, placing her right on his lap. “That looks really good.”

“More!” Emma points the crayon at Lardo, who slides her over another paper. She gets to work coloring, stopping to turn and make sure Nursey is paying attention ever few minutes. He catches Lardo’s eye and she smiles.

“What?”

“Like I said. It looks good on you.”

\-- 

“I’ll trade you peanut M&Ms for a Hershey bar.” Hayley bargains with Julia.

“Okay!” Julia, dressed as Cinderella, reaches into her bag and makes the trade. Dex glances in the rearview mirror.

“Hayley, sit your bottom back in your seat.” Nursey turns around from the passenger seat to see Hayley stretching her seatbelt to the limit as she leans from the third row to the middle row of seats. Chowder sits next to her and gives Nursey a guilty look.

Hayley wears Dex’s old Samwell jersey, tied up in the back with a rubberband and carries Nursey’s old hockey stick. Nursey only tripped over it twice while they trick or treated around the neighborhood.

Dex pulls into Bitty and Jack’s driveway and the six of them unload from the old Explorer. Hayley and Julia race to the doorbell and Jack opens it a second later.

“Trick or treat!”

“Oh my lord, don’t you two look amazing!” Bitty joins Jack at the doorway. “Come on in, I’ve got fresh baked pie and warm apple cider for you girls.” They race into the house.

“Happy Halloween Bits,” Dex smiles. 

“Happy Hal-A BABY PUMPKIN!” He practically leaps onto the front porch with a speed Nursey hasn’t seen since they were all on the ice. He grabs Emma from Dex’s arms and fusses over her.

“How was trick or treating?” Jack asks as Nursey, Dex and Chowder follow him into the house. Jack surprised Bitty with the beautiful old brick house after graduation (Nursey was barely surprised, this was the same guy who bought Bitty an _oven_ before they were even _dating_ ). They head towards the kitchen to find the girls and Shitty digging into slices of pie. 

“The frogs are here!” He lifts a beer in salute.

“Uncle S, why do you call them frogs?” Hayley asks between bites of pie. Shitty had given himself the nickname and (much to Nursey’s amusement and Dex’s irritation), it stuck.

“Well, my dear future Samwell hockey player,” He motions to her jersey and Hayley’s face lights up. Nursey glances over at Dex who grimaces. “It all starts with a very important document called the Samwell Men’s Hockey Bylaws…” He gives them a slightly watered down version of the rules and explains how frog is a term for freshman but Nursey’s class was ‘so darn froggy’ that they became the eternal frogs.

Eventually the girls all settle in the living room to watch It’s The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown while the boys sit at the kitchen table with beers. They talk hockey, Holster’s hilarious stories about the high school team he is coaching and chirp Chowder for turning beet red when they reminded him of Farmer’s Halloween costume their junior year. Bitty laments over Ransom and Holster not getting to visit as often and Shitty laments that Ransom chose a job in the pharmaceutical industry.

“Speaking of sellouts, are you going to Cooper’s bachelor party next weekend?”  Shitty turns to Nursey. Nursey gives a noncommittal shrug.

“Eh.”

“You actually know someone named Cooper?” Dex rolls his eyes.

“Present company excluded, he was the least irritating member of the Andover Hockey Team.” Shitty explains. “He got a cozy gig in insurance and is getting hitched to a model.”

He doesn’t press the subject and then end up talking a little while longer. When Dex goes to check on the girls he comes back laughing, saying they are all fast asleep. They carry them to the car, Bitty following behind with two bags of food “he just had lying around”. (Translation: I made all of this for you and pretended to have a magical freezer).

“Shotgun.” Nursey whispers as they approach the car. Chowder lets out a soft gasp. 

“Not fair Nursey, you had it on the way here!”

They get the girls into the car without much fuss and start the drive home. Nursey stares out the window counting jack o lanterns when Dex clears his throat.

“You should go to that party.” He says abrubtly. “If you want.” 

“It’s in Boston. And it’s the night before Hayley’s last soccer game.” It’s the least convincing of his excuses, but it will do.

“You’ve been to every game Nurse, she’ll understand.” Dex keeps his eyes on the road and Nursey shifts his attention back to staring out the window. 

“Maybe.”

\--

_November_

Nursey is usually pretty good at slapping on a smile and at least pretending to enjoy himself. But not tonight.

No, tonight he feels antsy and out of place as the group of Andover alumni sit around an expensive dinner table and talk about law school, medical school, business school, the stock market. He never really fit in with the crowd to begin with but talks of the market and industry makes him feel even more of an outsider. 

“How about you Nursey, are you working?” Jonathan asks, already on his third scotch.

“Not yet.” He keeps his answer simple and takes a sip of his whisky.

“You’re nannying or something, right? I see your Instagram.” His old defensive partner (and, really, how did he ever play decent hockey with anyone other than Dex?) comments.

“I’m helping out a friend.” _Chill,_ he tells himself. He knows his voice is getting tight.

Shitty changes the subject to hockey and Nursey is grateful. He checks his phone under the table and sees a new text from Chowder: it’s a picture of Emma covered in applesauce and says ‘She took control of the spoon! Disaster!’ He chuckles and stashes the phone away. 

They go to another bar for more drinks and meaningless conversation. Halfway into his fifth whiskey, Nursey realizes he actually hates being here. The only reason he is here is because Dex told him to go. Dex. He wonders what he is doing right now.

“Be right back,” He leaves his group of friends, heading towards the bathroom but actually slipping out a side door into a chilly alleyway. He takes out his phone.

“ _Hello_?”

“Heyyyyy.”

“ _Oh boy. I thought we retired Nursey Patrol our junior year_?" 

“Only because you would just shove me upstairs to the attic when I got too out of hand.” 

“ _Mhm. How’s the party_?” 

“Prep school kids are kind of snobby.” Dex lets out a real laugh and it warms Nursey, even though he left his coat inside.

“ _They aren’t all that bad.”_

“Are you complimenting me, Poindexter?”

“ _Why’d you call Nurse?”_ Nursey shakes his head. _Ten points for deflection_. If they had really been keeping score of the times Nursey and Dex danced around talking about real feelings they’d both be in the thousands by now.

“I don’t know. Missed you I guess.”

“’ _You miss me, Poindexter_?’” Dex’s voice goes an octave deeper and it sounds like he is attempting an obnoxious New York accent. 

“Are you trying to sound like me? Man, that sounds nothing like me!”

“ _Sure, Nursey_.” He opens his mouth to do his own Dex impression when the alley door swings open and Shitty sticks his head out.

“I’ll be right in.” He tells him and Shitty just shrugs and closes the door. 

“ _You better get back. I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon, yeah_?” 

“Yeah.” 

“ _Enjoy the party Nurse_.”

“Okay.” He knows his voice is all sorts of pouty and sad but Dex doesn’t chirp him for it. Enjoy your…sleep.”

\--

Nursey had set his alarm for seven am but nearly sleeps through it. It’s only when Lardo throws a pillow at his head ( _why was he on the floor? He was supposed to be crashing on her and Shitty’s couch?)_.

“Turn that shit off, Nursey.” He does as he is told and finds his things in the living room. He quickly brushes his teeth and when he exits the bathroom Lardo hands him a water and two advil.

“You’re leaving early.”

“Got a soccer game to catch.” She nods and waves him off. 

He drives slightly over the speed limit after stopping for coffee. As he approaches the field it dawns on him that he is 1) in the same clothes as the night before and 2) reeks of a distillery.   But he’s already cutting it close and stopping to change would mean missing the first half.

Dex is easy to spot, sitting on a fold up chair with Julia and Emma on a thick blanket at his feet. He has that green beanie on, the one both of them claim ownership to and neither of the can remember who actually owns it. 

“Nursey!” Emma gives him away but he doesn’t mind, instead giving both of the girls hugs and settling down on the blanket. He looks up at Dex who is looking at him with a strange expression. 

“You miss me, Poindexter?” He’s rewarded with a smile and a head shake and the whistle blows signaling the start of the game.

“You know…” Dex starts towards the end of the match. Nursey turns to look at him. Dex is biting the side of his mouth and not exactly looking at Nursey, but also not looking away. “If you’re gonna be sticking around for a little while, we should look into converting the attic to a bedroom.”

Nursey knows his mouth is open and his eyes are wide and he probably looks like an idiot who has no chill, but in this moment he doesn’t care. Of course Dex has figured him out, that he didn’t really ever intend to stay just a few weeks and that he was too chicken to bring it up. But not only is Dex not kicking him out…he’s making space for him. He’s making a space for Nursey in their family, in their lives. 

He goes for a chirp because it’s his only option that doesn’t involve him bursting into tears.

“You’re trying to get rid of me Dex?” For once, Dex doesn’t take the bait. He looks Nursey right in the eye. 

“Never.”

If Hayley hadn’t run up to them at that particular moment, covered in dirt and waving around a trophy, he surely would have melted into the ground.

“So overall how did you like soccer?” Dex asks as they walk back to the parking lot. 

“It was good, I liked when I scored goals.” Nursey grins at Dex. “But I was thinking….can I play hockey?” Both boys look at Hayley in surprise. 

“Hockey?” Dex managed to squeak out. 

“Yes.” She’s very matter of fact, a clear contrast to her brother who looks like he just got sucker punches. Nursey really hopes Shitty’s ‘gender stereotypes’ spidey senses aren’t tingling.

“Well. Um. Me and Nursey and Chowder will have to talk about it…it’s a big commitment.” Hayley nods in agreement.

“Can I do gymnastics?” Julia tugs on Dex’s free hand.

“Jesus.” Dex mutters and looks to the sky.

\--

He sits on the living room floor with Dex, Chowder, beer and seven baskets of laundry.

“I think she would like hockey.” Chowder matches up two pink socks and puts them in the ‘Julia’ pile. “It helped you with your temper Dex, maybe it would help her.”

“Well, it helped Dex a _little_ bit.” Nursey can’t resist and gets a onesie thrown at his head for the chirp.

“She’d need new skates. And she doesn’t turn 8 until December so she couldn’t even join the Mites until then. It would mean more carpooling.” Dex is always thinking logistics.

“Bet Jack would love to take her to practice one day.”

“Oh my god, can you imagine the look on those kids faces?”

“Imagine the look on the _coaches_ faces!”

They share a laugh and fold laundry for another minute.  Dex groans and takes another swig of his beer.

“If we let Hayley play hockey we’re going to have to let Julia sign up for gymnastics.” Nursey and Chowder exchange a look: Julia already swings on the shower curtain rod and the bannister. Encouraging that behavior might be dangerous.

“At least they aren’t asking to play lacrosse?” Chowder shrugs and they all chers to that.

\--

The drive to Maine is supposed to take four hours, but with the traffic on Wednesday evening it takes over six. By the time they reach Dex’s grandparents, Nursey has the Frozen movie memorized every single Poindexter sister has cried at least once. The Falconers were on a roadie on the West Coast for the holiday which meant Dex and Nursey are outnumbered. Nursey regrets not packing a flask.

“Look at all of the snow!” Hayley squeals as they finally pull into the driveway. “Will, can we make snowmen tomorrow?”

“And snow angels?” Julia asks, pressing her face against the window.

“Course, that’s why we brought your snow stuff.” They were only staying for two nights, but the trunk of the car was filled with stuff. Nursey never realized how much crap kids required. 

The girls scramble to get out of the car the moment Dex cuts the engine and Dex lets out a long sigh. Nursey chuckles.

“You know, that may have been louder than any Samwell roadie. And that includes the one where Tango thought there was a mouse on the bus.”

“Think this means they will go down easy for bed?” Dex glances through the windshield to see his sisters running up the path towards the open front door.

“OUT!” Emma yells from her car seat and Nursey laughs.

“Nope, I think they will be just as wild as always.” He gets out of the car and frees Emma from her carseat, where she is kicking wildly.

“Walk!” She demands.

“Not on this ice, squirt.” She kicks against Nursey’s side the whole walk up. 

He had been to the Poindexter Grandparent’s house once during a summer visit and once more after the funeral. It was a cozy cottage with three bedrooms and Nursey is immediately grateful for the fireplace.

“Derek,” Ginny Poindexter gives him one of the shortest hugs of his life. Dex describes her as the ‘cold English type who is still pissed her son knocked up my mom in high school.’ 

“Thank you again for having me.” He answers and she waves him off, choosing instead to remark about how big Emma has gotten since the summer. Dex’s grandfather sits in the corner in an old leather chair and watches Hayley and Julia play with their old tabby cat.

Nursey hands Emma over to her grandmother and helps Dex unload the car, noticing how quiet he is. It’s probably exhaustion: he worked a half day and then drove in traffic for six hours, but Nursey notices the frown line in between his eyebrows is back.

The frown line always fascinates Nursey: it appears at predictable times like midterms, or when a tadpole was puking off the back porch of the Haus, or when the dryer just wouldn’t stop making that weird noise. But every now and then it shows up for a reason Nursey couldn’t quite place. He always tried to make it better anyway. 

“Hey,” Nursey swings two small suitcases over his shoulder. “If you need like, a minute or anything, just uh, you know. Let me know.”

“So eloquent.” Dex cracks a smile and Nursey is tempted to give him a shove, but knows it would likely backfire and he would end up slipping on the ice. “It’s just…weird. Without them here too.” His voice is gruff and Nursey notices he takes two steadying breaths. They haven’t talked about his parents since Dex’s breakdown in the kitchen.

“Yeah.” Is all Nursey can really offer and he hates himself a little for it. They grab the rest of the bags and head up the walkway towards the house. It’s barely a second after they walk through the door that Gran gives Dex a sharp look.

“You are letting your _sister_ play _hockey_?”

Oh yeah. Definitely should have packed the flask.

\-- 

Nursey blinks his eyes open to the sound of then door creaking.

“Will?” Julia is a terrible whisperer.

“Jules?”

“Nursey!” He hears two pairs of feet scampering across the room and they climb on top of his twin bed. He and Dex were bunking in his dad and Uncle’s old room, which looked like it has not been updated since 1990.

“We can’t sleep. It’s cold in Aunt Carol's old room.” Hayley’s only slightly better at being quiet.

“And Emma is in here.” Julia points to the pack and play, which would only fit right next to Dex’s bed. “So we want to be too.”

“Not a chance.” Dex’s gruff voice comes from across the room. “Go back to bed girls.”

“But I am _scared_.” He can’t see her, but Nursey knows Julia is sticking her bottom lip out. 

“What are you scared of?” Nursey asks.

“What if a moose knocks down the house?” Dex lets out a half-snort, half-groan and Nursey softly chuckles. 

“You know, I was scared of moose attacks too when I first came to visit you guys. You were just a baby,” he reaches out and lightly fluffs Julia’s hair. “But you know what your brother told me?” 

“What?” They ask in unison. 

“He said ‘If a moose comes for you Nurse, I got your back.’ So I promise girls, if a moose comes for you, we got your back, okay?” They sound their agreement and shuffle out of the room. Nursey wraps the blanket back around himself.

“I remember saying it a lot more sarcastic than that.”

“Yeah, well, I believed you anyways. Night Dex." 

He swears he’s already asleep when he hears a soft ‘ _Night Derek’_  

\-- 

Gran is apparently big on gender roles and banishes all men and anyone under twelve from her kitchen, which means Nursey spends most of the morning in the snow. The alternative is watching football with Dex’s conservative Uncle Scott or watching his Aunt Carol get slowly more drunk as the morning went on.

Aunt Carol brought her three kids (‘ _They’ll go with their_ father _for Christmas because of course that’s how my life goes, but I’ll give them a damn good holiday he can’t even top.’)_ So far her three kids didn’t seem to be enjoying their holiday one bit: the oldest Sarah, was fifteen and glued to her cellphone and the boys, Joey and Kevin were engrossed in the football game.

Hayley seemed a little put out Sarah wouldn’t pay attention to her, but Dex distracted her into helping him build a snowman as tall as the front porch.

 _When old Jack Frost is sparkling on the ground…it’s Thanksgiving Time!_ He always thought that particular poem of Langston Hughes’ was silly, but today he gets it.

\--

Nursey had never been to a Thanksgiving where there was an actual “adult table” and “kids table”, but then again until Samwell he never spent a Thanksgiving not on vacation.

“Heavenly father, we thank you for this wonderful food and the family and friends gathered around our table.” Gran was the boss of everything: cooking, cleaning and apparently saying grace. They were supposed to bow their heads and keep their eyes shut. “And may the lord bless Edward and Jessica, who are watching us from heaven. They must be glad to see their children all back in Maine where they _belong_.” Nursey takes a chance and opens his eyes and glances across the table. Dex is staring right back at him and rolls his eyes.

Other than Dex’s Uncle Scott talking about the problems with immigrants and Aunt Carol getting more incoherent as the meal went on, the meal went on largely without any drama. Nursey still wishes he was at the kids table: he can hear Julia and Hayley laughing from the kitchen.

Dex has Emma on his lap and is feeding her bites of turkey from his plate, much to the disapproval of his grandmother. Ginny Poindexter may have known Dex her whole life, but Nursey knows Dex better: the more irritated Gran got, the more loud Dex got. 

“You want pumpkin pie, Emma?” Dex asks around dessert time. She throws her arms out to make a grab for it. 

“Pie!” Damn, Nursey really wishes he had his cell phone out. Bitty would love this.

“You spoil her, William.” Gran’s frown is very pronounced. Nursey once spent a whole summer with Dex’s family and he never saw his father frown like Gran did. Then again, Ed Poindexter didn’t really frown at much.

“Oh, I probably spoil her much more.” Nursey goes for an easy going tone and leans back in his chair a little. “Is that right, Em?”

“No!” She shakes her head but she’s laughing and has a mouth full of pumpkin pie so it’s hard to take her seriously.

“Scott, did you pick up the grave blankets?” Scott whips his attention from where he is whispering something into his wife’s ear. Nursey doesn’t think he heard the wife speak once this whole meal.

“Yep, they are in my trunk.” 

“Grave blankets?” Dex looks to his uncle.

“For Ed and Jessie. We’re all goin’ over tomorrow.”

“No, we aren’t.” Dex directs this statement at his grandmother and Nursey is really, _really_ starting to wish his said yes to a refill on his wine glass when Aunt Carol asked.

“Yes, we are. Tomorrow morning, ten o’clock.” His grandmother matches his steely gaze. 

“The girls are too young for that, it’s going to be way to sad and hard and ruin their whole holiday.” 

All of these things might be true, by Nursey hears what Dex doesn’t say: that it’s too hard for him, that staring at his parents graves while being surrounded by family members that are driving him nuts is not his ideal way to start the day. 

Gran either doesn’t pick up on it or doesn’t care. 

“Well William, we are all going tomorrow morning and that includes anyone sleeping under this roof.” Dex doesn’t take his eyes off of Emma for the rest of the meal and they go to bed in silence.

\--

Dex’s alarm goes off at six am and Nursey burrows his head further into his pillow. He hears the creak of a bed and two feet hit the floor.

“Why are you getting up?” 

“I’m packing up.” He hears a zipper and cracks one eye open. Dex is folding clothes quickly and placing them into a suitcase.

“It’s still dark out.” Nursey is well aware his early morning voice is more of a whine.

“We’re not coming back here after the graveyard.” He tosses a pair of thick socks into the suitcase with impressive accuracy. Nursey sits up and stretches his arms. 

“I think the correct term is cemetery.” 

“Shut the fuck up Nursey.” But he sees the beginning of a smile and presses on.

“If you want to bail we probably could. You can blame it on me. Say I believe in ghosts or something.”

“You _do_ believe in ghosts.” 

“Okay, first of all, you KNOW the attic ghosts are real, Rans and Holster did a Ouija board-“ Dex gives him an unimpressed look, but it wasn’t Dex who heard the Backstreet Boy songs at one in the morning. 

“We’ll stay for ten minutes so I don’t have to hear about it for the next ten years. And then we leave.” 

“Got it.” He almost salutes him (a move that drove Dex crazy when Dex was hockey captain their senior year), but he thinks better of it. 

The cemetery is covered in a fresh coating of snow and would almost look beautiful if you can get past the fact that there are dead people buried all over the place.

Hayley and Julia each hold one of Dex’s hands which leads Nursey to wrangle Emma. He tries to believe she is just an active one year old and that’s why she is being extra wiggly, but there’s a little part of him that feels like she is protesting on behalf of her older brother. 

“You gotta chill little one.” She pulls on his winter hat and kicks her little snow boots against his coat. She settles down after they lay the grave blanket out and Aunt Carol starts loudly crying. Nursey wonders if that’s partly fueled by her hangover. 

He walks up to where Dex is standing and Hayley moves to make room for Nursey.  Unsure of what else to do, he lightly bumps his shoulder into his. They stare at the graves for a while, lost in thoughts. _As I ebb’d with the ocean of life…._

The car ride back is quiet for the first ten miles. In a moment of desperation, Nursey offers to put Frozen into the DVD player, but Hayley just sadly shakes her head and answers “no thank you.” 

Dex hasn’t taken his eyes off of the road but Nursey notices he tenses up every few minutes and starts to rapidly blink. When he hears Julia sniffle, he caves.

“Did you girls know that Stevie Wonder sings some Christmas songs?” 

“Really?” Hayley asks. Nursey spins in his seat and smiles at her. Julia wipes her cheeks and looks excited.

“Really. What do you girls say to starting the Christmas season early with some tunes?”

“Yay!” Nursey turns back to the front and searches for the songs on his phone. 

“Thank you.” He looks up and Dex is smiling, just a little, but it’s there. 

“It’s chill.” And everything seems right in the world when Dex rolls his eyes and Stevie’s voice fills the car.

 

 

 

_Notes:_

_The book Nursey reads to Emma is called “Five Little Pumpkins and the little boy I babysit was obsessed with it last month so I now have it memorized._

_“Thanksgiving Time!” Is a cheesey but sweet Langston Hughes Poem._

_The poem Nursey thinks of in the cemetery “As I Ebb’d with the Ocean of Life” – Walt Whitman_


	3. Part 3: Chowder (December)

_This one is a few days late because I ended up rewriting half of the chapter...I'm much happier with this version and hope you all enjoy! I also decided I will be adding an epilogue to this story (again in Chowder's POV) because I enjoyed writing Chowder so much!  If you celebrate holidays this time of year I hope you all have a happy one :) Part 4 is back to Nursey and will be up after the new year!!_

_Thank you to everyone who has left a comment on this story...they really do make my dad and inspire me to keep going._

**Part 3: Chowder (December)**  

Being a professional hockey player is very, very strange sometimes.

There’s the grueling schedule, the meal plans and trainers and specialists for every potential aliment only a call away. And then there are the media days, event appearances and meetings with the social media coordinator to talk about “curating his instagram.” ( _Jack said Chowder didn’t have to take their advice so he uses just as many exclamation points and emojis as usual_ ).

He has an agent ( _weird_ ), stock investments ( _weirder_ ) and Snowy’s actual phone number in his actual phone ( _by far the most surreal. He’ll never delete the text he got from him after his first NHL start --_ Sweet saves out there, Chow _\-- Swawesome didn’t begin to cover it_.)

But some things remain the same: playing hockey is as exciting as ever ( _though the rinks are much louder!),_ Caitlin texts him a silly joke every morning and he gets to live with his two best friends. Well, his two best friends and three wild girls. 

Speaking of.

“Hey Dex.”

“Hey, I am so sorry, I know you’re coming off a roadie and had afternoon practice today,” Dex sounds a little frazzled which usually means something has gone wrong in his carefully planned schedule. “But they asked me to work a little late for this big meeting and Nursey’s at the dentist with Hayley and Emma and he’s also running late so can you pick Julia up from gymnastics? I don’t know any other the other parents so we don’t have a carpool yet.”

“Yeah, sure! Just text me the address.”

“You’re a lifesaver Chow.”

“What’s the big meeting about?”

“City Hall is finally coming around to review our proposal. Angie wants me to be there.”

“Totally swawesome!” Chowder throws his bag in the trunk of his car and shuts the hood.

“It’s not too big of a deal.” It is, but Dex is modest to a fault. Chowder can tell he is smiling anyway. “I’ll text you the gym address, thanks man.”

“Chowder, you want to go get dinner?” Tater calls from across the parking lot. Tater’s car borders on being classified as a monster truck.

“No thanks, Tater! I’m picking up Julia from gymnastics.” He’s a little proud: his schedule usually means he misses the chance to pick up the girls. He has to miss Hayley’s school concert but Dex promised to tape the whole thing. Bitty is even lending him his good camera he uses for vlogs. 

He gets caught in some traffic but makes it to the gym right as the class is wrapping up. Julia waves her hands excitedly and practically bounces over when she sees him. 

“Chowder! Did you see my split? I tried to do it like we practiced.”

“You were amazing!” And it was true. ( _Even if Nursey chirped them for doing splits in the middle of the kitchen and sent a snapchat to everyone_.) “Are they getting easier?” 

“Yes, I am almost the best one in class. We have to keep practicing.” The Poindexter girls were a determined bunch: Hayley begged to stay at the hockey rink after practice and Emma still won’t nap without a fight.

“Anytime!” She fetches her coat, hat, scarf and mittens and he makes sure she’s all bundled up before walking out into the cold. It’s his fifth New England winter but he’s still not used to the way the wind goes right through you and chills you to the bone.

They deicide to pick up pizza for dinner and when his phone rings on their drive back to the house, Julia asks to answer it. 

“Hello this is Chowder’s phone!” He starts to laugh. “Hi Caitlin! He’s driving. He picked me up from gymnastics. When are you coming here?”

Caitlin was offered an assistant coaching position for the West Virginia volleyball team and had spent a long weekend in October in Providence: the girls loved her immediately. They were almost as excited as he was for her to spend the holidays with them. 

“I can count to ten days. I have ten fingers. So does Chowder.” He doesn’t think he will ever get over how funny kids are. “I can tell him!” She pulls the phone away from her ear and turns to Chowder. “Caitlin said to call her later, she has a meeting now.”

“Okay! Please tell her I love her.”

“He loooooooves you.” She sings it and bursts into giggles. She listens for a minute and then turns to Chowder. “She loooooooves you too! You guys are gross!”

\--

Chowder brings two beers to the detached garage. He hears music blasting before he even opens the door and recognizes Tears for Fears. 80’s music means Dex might be in a _slightly_ better mood than expected.

“I’m not overreacting.” Is the greeting he gets. He hands Dex a beer and shrugs.

“Okay.”

“I know Nursey thinks I am, but I’m not.” Chowder has unfortunately been in this situation enough times that he knows less words from him are better. Eventually Dex (and Nursey) talk themselves right. “It’s just…he should have checked with me first.” 

“He should have.” Nursey _definitely_ should have checked with Dex first before ordering hundreds of dollars worth of Christmas presents on ‘sweet cyber Monday sales’.

“We agreed, the American Girl dolls were going to be the big gifts.” ( _Well, Chowder agreed. Nursey just shrugged.)_ “Whatever,” Dex drills two wood planks together. The porch swing is coming along nicely. “How’s the team looking for the game against Philly coming up?”

Chowder talks about their practices and a few new plays and Tater’s love for Philadelphia Cheesesteaks. He asks Dex about work and Dex launches into a story about how their computer software updated and for a whole hour everyone’s system was in French and it was a madhouse.

“Seriously, Chow, I was about to call you. You’re way more competent than our IT guy. I swear he’s stoned half the time, and not even in the Shitty way where he gets smarter. He gets more incompetent. If possible.” 

“I miss computers sometimes.” Chowder admits. “I mess around with code sometimes on planes or a bus, but it’s not the same.” Dex looks up from his drill and turns his head slightly.

“Really?”

“Yeah.” He takes anther sip of his beer. “I mean, playing hockey is amazing! But yeah. Sometimes I miss it.”

“Well next time my computer asks me for my ‘mot de passe’ I’ll give ya a call.” 

“You might want to try Jack for that one first.” Chowder smiles. He watches Dex work in silence for a few minutes before he puts the tools down and sighs.

“Nursey was really good with Hayley yesterday.” He doesn’t have to elaborate: they got out old Christmas decoration bins and Hayley pulled out her moms stocking and immediately started crying. Nursey pulled her into a hug and listened to her while she cried and reassured her that they wouldn’t get rid of the stocking, they would still hang it up because even if they weren’t here, they were still a big part of Christmas.

Chowder can admit that goalies are weird, but they are also observant. They have a clear view of the ice: they keep an eye on where the puck is, predict where it’s going, all while keeping track of the other players out there.

It was sometime in the middle of their frog year when he noticed things start to shift. At first, he was just happy his two best friends were not constantly a step away from punching each other.   They still bickered, but it was less malicious and more of just what Nursey and Dex _did_. But like a complicated computer code, Chowder couldn’t just let it sit. He started to pay attention to how they acted _to_ each other, not just _around_ each other.

And then it all made sense. How Nursey would always find some excuse to be around the Haus when he knew Dex would be fixing things. How Dex didn’t have patience for a lot, but would listen without complaint to Nursey sort out his words when he had an assignment due. How the both of them were always looking at each other when the other one wasn’t.

Secretly, Chowder loved the Harry Potter-ness of it all. He even reread the sixth and seventh book to confirm his suspicions. 

“He spoils the girls rotten. But he’s probably trying to make Christmas special. It’s gonna be hard without our parents, ya know?” Chowder nods. There was really no question that he would stay for the holidays this year. “It’s really nice of your parents to fly all the way out.” 

“It’s no problem! My sister’s off in Arizona with her girlfriend now. Plus, she’ll never admit it, but I think mom misses the snow. They are excited to see all of their old grad school friends who still live on the east coast.” 

“And _your_ girlfriend will be here too. Should I put out some mistletoe?” In a moment of immaturity, Dex wiggles his eyebrows. 

“You look just like Julia when you do that!” 

\--

It doesn’t matter that they’ve been together for four years: waking up next to Caitlin Farmer is Chowder’s favorite thing in the entire world. He always wakes up before her ( _she’s as bad of a morning person as Nursey_ ) and sometimes he just looks at her and smiles. Even when her hair is a knotty mess, even when there’s drool on her cheek…she’s perfect to him.

“Wake up Cait,” he tucks a brown strand of hair behind her ear. She groans and burrows further into the pillow. He doesn’t have practice today and Jack let him off the hook for an optional skate. ( _He’s pretty sure the only reason Jack planned a skate for today was so he could escape the party preparation at his own house_.)

“It’s early.” She mumbles but flips over, blinks her eyes open and smiles up at him. “Hi.”

“Hi beautiful.” He leans down and gives her a peck on the lips.

“How do you kill vegetarian vampires?” She asks through a yawn, stretching her hands over her head. 

“How?”

“With a steak to the heart!” She grins and he laughs. The first night he ever slept over her dorm room he woke up feeling awkward and didn’t know what to say. Clearly, she could sense his panic and told a silly joke to break the ice (“ _What kind of shoes does ninjas wear? Sneak-ers!_ ” _)_. It worked, and it’s been a tradition ever since.

“I love you.” Chowder wraps his arms around her and snuggles in when there is a knock at his door.

“Chowder? Can I come in?” He recognizes Julia’s voice and is grateful he and Caitlin remembered to pull on pajamas last night. 

“Sure!” The door opens and she darts into the room, jumping up on the bed. 

“Good morning! No one else is awake yet!” She’s wearing a bright pink robe over a Cinderella nightgown. Caitlin picks her head up from her pillow and smiles.

“Morning Julia. Are you excited for the party today?”

“Yes! It’s my first fancy Christmas party ever. And I have a new dress. It’s red. It matches Hayley and Emma though.” She makes a face.

“Hey, matching is cute!” Chowder ( _who picked out the dresses_ ) frowns.

“But I don’t _want_ to match my sisters. I want to match…you!” She points at Caitlin.

“Well, you’re in luck, my dress is red too!” Julia’s eyes light up and she flings herself so she’s in between Chowder and Caitlin.

“Are you guys married?” She looks back and forth between them. Chowder’s eyes widen and he sputters out an answer. 

“Uh, no, why?”

“My friend Jamie said only married people have sleepovers. But I told her that Nursey and Will have sleepovers and they aren’t married.” Caitlin bites down her lip to contain a laugh. She’s been trying to subtly match make those two for _years_.

“Well not-married people can have sleepovers too.” She ponders it for a minute. 

“When you two _do_ get married can I be your flower girl?” Farmer laughs and pulls Julia in for a hug. 

“Of course you can.” And it’s a little silly because they’ve talked about it before and they are both very clear with their future together, but Chowder feels his heart flip at the easy way in which Caitlin says it. Julia snuggles up to her and Caitlin tickles her and Chowder grabs his phone to take a picture because it’s the moments like this that are always worth saving.

They stay in bed until everyone else starts to wake up and then head to the kitchen for a lazy breakfast. Nursey makes pancakes, Dex makes the coffee and Chowder is in charge of the bacon. Julia performs multiple Christmas songs for everyone and Caitlin bounces Emma on her lap. Hayley looks up from her book just as Dex takes the first sip of his coffee. 

“Do you think Santa will bring us a puppy for Christmas?” Nursey drops the whisk into the batter and Chowder freezes at the oven. He looks over to Dex who calmly lowers his mug before answering.

“No, I don’t think he will.”

“Why not?” She raises one eyebrow ( _Lardo really should not have taught her that trick, it makes her look much older than eight_ ).

“Well, I think Santa thinks ahead and he doesn’t want us to potty train both Emma and a puppy at the same time.” Chowder is pretty impressed. There’s also a part of him that wonders if he gave the same answer to Nursey recently.

“I can teach Emma how to use the potty.” Julia offers. Emma claps her hands together and Dex rolls his eyes, handing Nursey a paper towel just as he spills batter down his front.

Caitlin catches Chowder’s eye and gives him a pointed look. One week in their junior year she tried to keep track of every time Dex anticipated Nursey tripping over his own feet, spilling something on himself or knocking something over.

She lost count after thirty.

\-- 

“WHO WANTS PRESENTS?” Holster may as well have kicked down the front door with the dramatics of his entrance. 

“I DO!” Hayley and Julia sprint to him and he managed to pick them both up at the same time. Ransom brings up the rear holding brightly wrapped boxes and laughing loudly at his boyfriend’s antics. With Ransom’s busy job and Holster balancing graduate school and coaching high school hockey, they didn’t get to see them as often as they would like.

The girls tear open the boxes to reveal a set of walkie talkies and nerf guns. The girls shout with delight and follow Nursey into the kitchen to get batteries.

“Really?” Dex looks like he is ready to start drinking.

“Come on!” Holster gets Dex in a headlock. “You said they weren’t getting along, this will help!” 

“It helped you and Nursey.” Ransom reminds them. Caitlin snorts and Chowder shakes his head.

“It did n _ot_ , Ransom. Nursey shot Dex in the face and gave him a black eye and Dex threw his walkie talkie into the pond when Nursey wouldn’t stop paging him at two am.” 

“Well, it all worked out anyhow.” Ransom shrugs. Dex and Holster wrestle a little more before the girls come flying into the room and shooting nerf bullets at them.

They have a relaxing afternoon: Hayley asks Holster to teach her how to make hockey plays, which he does using her crayons and multiple pieces of construction paper. When Emma wakes up from her nap, Ransom gives her a present: a tiny Samwell University sweatshirt printed on it.

“That’s actually mad cute.” Nursey remarks when Ransom pulls the sweatshirt over her head.

“They have the cutest stuff at the bookstore, little hats and scarves and onesies for infants.” Emma claps her hands together and Ransom beams.

“Sounds like someone is getting baby fever.” Caitlin teases but he grins and glances over at his boyfriend. 

“Holtzy still has a year left of school-”

“I told you, I _want_ my diploma to say Birkholtz-Oluransi on it.” 

“That’s a long last name to be on a diploma.” Chowder muses. Ransom and Hoslter do their weird synchronized shrug in perfect time. 

“Well if you’re really getting baby fever, please feel free to come watch the girls for a night.” Dex settles back into the armchair and Julia crawls onto his lap. 

“Can we watch Rudolph?” Dex checks his watch.

“Yeah, but after we have to start getting ready for the party.”

 --

Getting the girls ready to go anywhere is always an adventure.

“Okay, you wear the sweater over the dress.” Dex stands in the living room and pulls a sweater over Julia’s arms. She opens her mouth to complain but Dex shakes his head. “I don’t care if it covers your bow, it’s freezing outside.” 

“Aw man, quit squirming Emma, I’m trying to buckle your shoe” Nursey all but jams the black dress shoe on her feet.

“Two beautiful braids, tied with two matching red ribbons.” Chowder claps his hands and Hayley gives him a fist-bump.

They rotate: Hayley to Dex for her sweater, Julia to Nursey for her shoes, Emma to Chowder so he can pull her curls into pigtails. None of them notice Holster, Ransom and Caitlin staring at them from their spots on the couch.

“Is anyone else thinking what I am thinking?” Ransom asks. 

“ _Whatever happened to predictability_ ” Holster starts to sing. It takes Chowder a minute, but then he catches on and lets out a laugh.

“Does that make me hot Aunt Becky?” Caitlin, who looks stunning in her long red dress, winks at Chowder.

“Yo, if anyone is John Stamos, it’s me.” Nursey slides Julia over to Chowder and holds out Hayley’s shoes for her to take. 

“Oh please.” Dex rolls his eyes and wrestles with Emma to get another layer on her. They manage to make it out of the house relatively on time and the short drive to Jack and Bitty’s is easy.

The house looks right out of a magazine: lit up with white lights, decorated with greenery, red bows and a Falconers wreath on the front door. Jack greets them with warm smiles and takes their coats while Bitty fusses over the matching outfits on the girls.

“Caitlin Farmer! It’s so wonderful to see you!” Bitty pulls her into a warm hug and they walk towards the living room together. The smell of cinnamon, vanilla and cedar from the tree are all in the air and the snow lightly falls outside. Magical. 

Most of the Falconers and their families are there plus George and her wife, the nice intern from PR, Bittle’s parents, Bob and Alicia Zimmermann ( _be cool Chowder, be cool, you’ve known them for four years, you shouldn’t shake anymore_ ) and a few other people Chowder recognizes from the bakery Bitty works at.

He turns to Dex to ask if he’s seen Lardo yet, but Dex is literally gazing at Nursey, who is holding Emma’s hand and carefully walking her over to the craft section for the kids. Chowder notices Dex’s soft stare comes out the most when Nursey is with the girls.

“I feel like this is a very grown up party.” Caitlin wraps an arm around Chowder’s side and he leans down and kisses the side of her head.

“Shitty even has pants on.” Dex, who has finally broken his gaze, hands Chowder a beer and Caitlin a glass of red wine. 

“Oh god, I really hope he keeps them on. Remember Jack’s birthday two summers ago?” Chowder winces at the memory and Dex barks out a laugh.

“He convinced Tater to go streaking through the party with him, nearly knocked Bitty and the cake over and they went flying into the pong table.” 

“No way!” Caitlin is laughing and Chowder looks mortified.

“It was _so_ embarrassing, it was the first time the Samwell team and the Falconers really got together and _that_ happened!”

“Yo,” Nursey walks up to them, looking like he is trying to remain calm but ready to start doing a celly. “We just got invited to be a part of the Falconers Family Playgroup. Oh my god.” His eyes are lit up and Dex hands him a beer.

“Pretty swawesome.”

“Wow Nursey, that’s great! The WAGS, or, I mean SOAPS as we call them now, are really nice. They have their own Instagram.”

“Listen to that Farms, your boy is trying to turn me into his _significant other or partner_.”

Dex and Nursey snicker, they are always in cahoots when it comes to chpring Chowder, but he doesn’t mind. It’s just how the three of them work. 

The party is a blast and Chowder loves getting to catch up and celebrate the holidays with everyone. At least ten kids are running around and at one point Marty’s son knocks over a jar of glitter and everyone is _covered._ Bitty doesn’t seem to mind though and Tater thinks it is hilarious: he lets the kids climb all over him and dump handfuls of glitter into his hair. 

When Chowder looks around to find Hayley, he finds her sitting next to Snowy on one of the couches showing him the plays she and Holster had made.

“Did she sneak those in under her coat?” Chowder asks Dex.

“Yep. We’ve created a monster.”

“I think she’s got a crush on Snowy."

“Really, Nurse?” Dex groans. “She’s eight.”

“I’m just saying.” And when Chowder looks back again he sees the complete admiration in her eyes and he starts to laugh. 

“I hate you both. Where’s Emma?” 

“I don’t think Jack’s parents are ever giving her back.” Caitlin points to across the room where Bad Bob and Alicia are absolutely fawning over Emma. Jack laughs when he walks past them and grabs Bitty’s hand to lead them to the front of the living room.

Jack clears his throat and people gradually start to quiet. He leans down and whispers something into Bitty’s ear, which makes Bitty elbow him say something back that sounds like ‘ _ridiculous_!’. 

“We just wanted to thank everyone for coming to our party today. Y’all mean so much to us and have made our lives so special…” he trails off and looks up at Jack. He looks excited, but nervous and Jack is positively beaming. Jack grins and turns to the crowd. 

“Bits and I are getting married.”

There’s a second of silence, broken by a loud roar that could come from Holster, but it’s Shitty who flings himself at the couple and nearly tackles them to the ground. Everyone starts clapping and cheering and the group swarms around the happy couple. By the time Chowder reaches them, Bitty has tear tracks down his cheeks and Jack looks like he hit the lottery. Which, actually, isn’t too far off. 

“Bitty!” Chowder pulls him into a hug and Bitty half laughs, half sobs against Chowder’s shoulder. “I knew this would happen, I _knew_ you two would be the first ones married! It’s a Christmas miracle!” He can’t contain his enthusiasm, it’s even better than the time they sat the Frogs down on the old green couch and told them they were dating. Caitlin chuckles next to him and Dex and Nursey are definitely chirping him, but he doesn’t care.

The rest of the night is full of toasts and celebrations and Chowder is thankful Dex and Caitlin decided to be the drivers. Ransom and Holster pass out in the backseat of his car after trying to climb into the car seats. 

“Bitty and Jack are getting _married_ ,” Chowder sighs happily against the window. “And Ransom and Holster are in love, and Shitty and Lardo are in love, and you and I are in love.” He turns to look at Caitling and she keeps her gaze on the road but she’s smiling.

“Seems like we just need one more pair to get their heads out of their asses and complete the set.”

“Maybe by next Christmas.” He starts to giggle, his breath fogging up the window.

\-- 

Chowder had a great childhood, but one of the perks of being an adult means you get to play Santa. 

“I can’t believe how much fun this is!” Chowder whispers to his dad as he gently places another package under the tree. His mom, Dex and Caitlin had an entire wrapping assembly line set up in the kitchen and Chowder, Nursey and his dad were in charge of delivery. 

“Christmas is always more magical with little ones.” His dad puts the finishing touches on a dollhouse that is so big Emma can probably sleep in it. Most of the presents are wrapped but the new bike for Hayley, the dollhouse for Julia and the play kitchen for Emma are on full display.

“I’m really happy you guys are here.” His dad clasps a hand on his shoulder.

“We are very happy to be invited.”

“Yo C, you want to help me fill the stockings?” Nursey comes in with a large shopping bag in one hand and a glass of red wine in the other. The increase in volume and giggles from the kitchen means his mother probably convinced them to open another bottle. The Chow women held their drink much better than the Chow men.

“Sure!” He delicately takes each stocking off of its hook and Nursey starts off by tossing a handful of candy in each. “This is pretty fun, huh?”

“It is. I never…thought I’d get to do this really.”

“Fill stockings?”

“No. I mean, yeah, but I meant…the whole thing. Big family Christmas, getting stuff together for the kids.” 

“You never wanted kids?” Chowder puts a few jars of Play Doh in Emma’s stocking. Nursey takes a long sip of wine before he replies. 

“Never really thought I was good with them.” Chowder must make a strange face because Nursey shrugs. “I didn’t have a lot of practice.” 

“You have a lot of practice now,” he points out. _Nail polish for Hayley, ribbons for Julia,_ the stockings are getting even more full. 

“Yeah but I don’t know if I’d want to raise them without--” He pauses for a second and Chowder widens his eyes. “Without, uh, you and Dex. We’re all a good team. Together. The three of us.”

“We are.” Chowder turns back to the fireplace so he can try to hide his smile. He knows that’s not what Nursey meant, but it’s Christmas so he’ll let it slide. 

\-- 

Chowder’s puts his parents up in his room which means he and Caitlin are bunking with Nursey and Dex.

“You two take the queen bed, you’re much bigger than Cait and I together. I mean like taller! Not fatter!” They all had more wine after setting up the presents and were probably doing a terrible job at keeping quiet.

“Maybe not _me_ ,” Dex reaches out and pinches Nursey’s belly and the latter lets out a yelp.

“Just because you’re naturally Dorito-shaped-“ 

“Ooo, like Chris Evans!” Caitlin crawls under Dex’s thick flannel comforter. She pats the side of the bed and looks expectantly at Chowder. Across the room, Nursey mimics the action and bats his eyes at Dex.

Chowder gets into his bed happily. Dex gets into his begrudgingly.

“Now you two, no funny business.” Nursey’s head pops up and he waggles a finger at them. Chowder can feel Cait about to respond next to him ( _and he would bet his favorite Sharks sweatshirt it would be_ “ _you either!”)_ so he beats her to it. 

“Very funny Nursey.”

“Yeah we wouldn’t do that in Dex’s bed.” Caitlin chimes in. 

“I’m honored.” Dex deadpans before reaching to turn off the bedside light. A few minutes of quiet go by before Nursey speaks up.

“Hey Dex, if we push the beds together we could make a mega bed.”

“No.”

Chowder and Caitlin can’t stop giggling and they can hear Nursey make a whining noise. 

“Go to sleep.” Dex uses the same tone as he does with his sisters and it only makes them laugh more. 

They finally settle down and Chowder is nearly asleep when he hears Nursey’s soft voice. 

“ _Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house_ -“

“Nurse, it’s two am. It literally IS Christmas and we have like four hours before the girls come storming in.” 

“….In my defense, I thought you were asleep.” 

“I would be if you didn’t keep yappin.” 

“Sorry. Night Dex.”

“Night Nurse….Merry Christmas.” There’s a moment of silence and when Nursey speaks again his voice sounds a little scratchy.

“You too.”

Chowder feels Caitlin poking him the ribs as if to say ‘ _see!!!!!_ ’ and he falls asleep smiling.


	4. Part 4: Nursey

_I continue to be completely overwhelmed and happy about the amazing response to this story. I apologize for the wait on this chapter!! Nursey is one of my favorites to write but he is also a wordy little pain in the ass and getting this chapter perfect took a while. I hope it does not disappoint._

_The next chapter (Dex) is the last part of 'real time' before the epilogue, brought to you by Chowder (and my fragile emotions)_

_[Also, please check out this amazing moodboard from vibraslapper for this story!!!!!](http://starks-and-mellarks.tumblr.com/post/155794224380/vibraslapper-fanfiction-aesthetics-1-cause) So freaking cool!! _

 

**Part 4: Nursey (Winter)**

When he was a child, Nursey hated winter. Winter meant staying inside in his brownstone, and no matter how much they turned the heat up it always felt cold. Winter meant snow that turned black the minute it hit the New York pavement and slippery slush that was dangerous for someone with his lack of balance. When he went to Andover, he could admit winter was pretty but it wasn’t until he was introduced to shinny that he realized winter was _wonderful_.

Luckily, Jack and Bitty’s backyard has a decent sized pond.

“Don’t you dare check her, Tater! Not even as a joke!”

“It’s okay Bitty, I can take it!” Hayley wears the exact same ‘come and get me’ grin as her older brother and it throws Nursey for a minute. 

“Little ginger one, you are small but trouble!” Tater laughs and bear hugs her. Bitty still looks nervous but Dex doesn’t seem to mind so Nursey isn’t worried yet. Shitty is on the far side of the pond teaching Julia how to skate backwards and Lardo has Emma in the house where it’s ‘ _not fifteen degrees out, you lunatics_ ’.

“How is she liking Junior Bears?” Jack skates up next to Nursey.

“She loves it. Getting her to leave the rink is a struggle.” Jack smiles and watches Hayley show off her hockey stop to Dex and Tater.

“Bitty has her schedule on the fridge, I think I can make a game later this month. If that’s okay with her.”

“Man, she would think it’s her birthday all over again.” Dex tries to tell Hayley not to brag about living with an NHL goalie and knowing many of the players on a first name (well, _nickname_ ) basis, but she’s the only girl on her travel team and Nursey thinks she deserves a little cred.

And maybe that will get some of the parents to stop giving him such weird looks when he picks her up from practice.

Dex passes the puck to Hayley and she dodges Tater, making a breakaway for the goal. She stops a few feet ahead of it and hits an impressive slap shot that bounces off of Chowder’s kneepad.

“Hayley that was a great shot!” Chowder flips open his goalie mask to give her a grin. She frowns.

“But it didn’t go in.” Nursey exchanges a look with Dex and both boys start to skate over to her, but Jack beats them to it. Jack crouches down so he is eyelevel with her.

“You know, Hayley, not every shot will go in. Even if it’s a great shot.”

“But that _stinks_.” She puts the hand not holding her stick on her hip.

“Yeah, it does.” Jack smiles. “But scoring goals is only part of the game. Do you know what the other parts are?” She takes a minute to answer.

“Having fun?” Jack nods encouragingly. “And playing with your teammates?”

“Exactly.” He stands up straighter, shoots a look at Bitty and then turns to Hayley. He has that look that usually ends with Shitty in a leaf pile. “But do you know what the best part of _shinny_ is?”

“What?”

“Chasing Bittle around!” They skate off at a quick speed towards Bitty who starts yelling about revoking pie privileges as he flees from them. 

\--

“Heavenly hot chocolate, fiancée.”

“Shi- _Uncle S_ , I am not _your_ fiancée.” Bitty rolls his eyes.

“But you are _a_ fiancée. So for the next few months I get to call you one.” Shitty lifts his mug in salute to Jack and Bitty. Emma sits on his lap and he lets her have a sip.

“What does fiancée mean?” Julia adds extra marshmallows to her hot chocolate.

“It’s a fancy word for people who are getting married.” Lardo answers.

“Like boyfriend, but upgraded.” Nursey wraps his hands around his warm mug and winks at her.

“Hayley wants Snowy to be her fiancée.” Julia states.

“ _Julia_!” Hayley flushes like a true Poindexter and looks down at her mug. Nursey looks immediately to Dex on his right, who is looking at the ceiling with a ‘help me’ expression. Tater lets out a booming laugh.

“Do not worry, every girl in Providence has crush on Snowy.”

“And half of the boys too.” Chowder points out. Shitty whistles.

“It’s a damn good looking team.” Hayley and Julia exchange a wide-eyed look. 

“PUPPY FUND!” They say in unison. Dex groans and Nursey laughs.

“Five bucks in the puppy fund for swearing.” Chowder holds his hand out with a solemn look on his face. Shitty looks outraged. 

“Are you shit- _SHIT_!”

“And we’re up to fifteen.” The puppy fund was Chowder’s idea after Emma repeated a not so nice word at the dinner table. Dex blames Nursey for her learning it, but Nursey _knows_ Dex has a mouth on him when he drives and she was in the car with him last.

Shitty forks over a twenty, muttering about a deposit, and the rest of the group chrips him while they finish their hot chocolate and pie. They go back out for another round on the ice and this time Dex brings Emma, sporting her brand new baby skates and helmet that Jack and Bitty had given her for Christmas.

“Okay, Emma, you’re going to skate over there to Nursey.” Dex props her up and points to him. Nursey sits down on the ice a foot away and waves at her.

“Nursey!” Emma waves her mittens around and Nursey swears he’s never seen anything so damn cute. Chowder and Bitty both are recording on their phones and the rest of the crew stands behind Nursey, clapping and cheering the toddler on.

“Ready Ems?” He holds his hands out and, slowly, she starts to inch forward towards him. She nearly looses her balance more than once, but she straightens herself and when she’s close enough, he pulls her in and gives her a big hug. Cheers erupt around him and she giggles in his ear.

 _“And your life shall be happy as mine is,_ _and as full of delight.”_  

\-- 

“Hey Jules, I’m going to go see if Hayles needs help with her homework. Can you make sure Emma stays on the couch?” Nursey places the youngest sister next to the middle one. Julia nods, not taking her eyes away from the tv screen and Nursey really can’t blame her: The Lion King is one of his favorites too.

He walks through the swinging door into the kitchen and sees Dex’s lower half sticking out from under the sink.

“Is the garbage disposal making weird noises again?” 

“No, Nurse, I’m just hanging out here for fun,” is his reply and Nursey smiles and pulls out a seat next to Hayley.

“How’s second grade?”

“Hard.” She points to her math worksheet, which has twenty different additions problems listed. “I don’t like math.” Nursey nods sympathetically. 

“Me either, but they tell me it’s important. Let’s see.” He helps her finish the problems and she seems a little more relaxed when she takes the next assignment from her green folder. It has an outline of a tree and blank spaces all around it.

“Will, what are we?” She calls over her shoulder.

“What?” There’s a sound of two metals hitting each other.

“I have to make a family tree for my homework and talk about where we are from. What are we?”

“Well.” Nursey turns around sees Dex has abandoned the project and is walking towards the table. He admires how Dex always stops what he is doing to give the girls his full attention. “Ma was Irish and her first name was Jessica. Her last name used to be O’Malley before she married Dad.” He points to the corresponding spot on the paper. “And Dad was Edward. But everyone called him Ed.” His smile is only a little sad as he watches Hayley write their names.

“Was dad Irish too?”

“Nope, he was English, Gran was born there and she came over when she was a little girl. I think Gramps was born in Maine but he was definitely English.” He helps her fill out her dad’s siblings and her mother’s side of the family.

“Nursey, what are you?”

“What?” He snaps his head up and raises his eyebrows.

“For my family tree. I need to know where you come from.”

He looks down at the large construction paper: sure enough she drew green ‘sibling’ lines from her name to her sisters, Dex, Chowder and…him.

The thing is, he knows the girls love him, he knows he’s more than just their older brother’s friend. But to have it on paper, staring right up at him, that Hayley considers him a part of her family…he feels like his whole world tilts a little.

“Well,” his throat is tight when he finally answers. “My mom grew up down in New Orleans, but I think her family was first from Haiti.” He notices out of the corner of his eye that Dex is paying attention to him. Dex doesn’t look concerned in the least that Nursey is in the inner circle of the family tree or that it’s completely rocking Nursey’s world. 

“What about your dad?”

“German. English.” _Jackass_. He has a feeling Dex picks up on that unspoken label. It’s not something they often talked about, but late at night after a couple of beers sometimes you get sentimental. Holster always said the bunk beds brought out secrets. 

“Where does Chowder’s family come from?” Dex ruffles her hair and sits back in the wooden chair.

“Guess we’re gonna to have to call him.”

\--

“Hey Nurse,” he feels someone shaking him. “Nursey.” It’s Dex and it’s early and Nursey burrows further into his pillow. 

“Mhmmm.”

“The girls want to wake you up for your birthday but I didn’t want you to get startled and clock ‘em in the eye.”

“What?” By the time the sentence registers, Dex has already left his side and is opening the door.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY NURSEY!” Hayley and Julia run in and leap on top of his bed. Thank god he’s gotten in the habit of wearing pajama bottoms. Dex brings Emma in and plops her on the bed.

“Smile for Chowder.” Dex holds up his phone and takes a few pictures.

“Will says we still have to go to school.” Julia pouts.

“Even though _he_ isn’t going to work.” Hayley crosses her arms and Nursey looks up at Dex in confusion.

“You’re not going to work?” 

“Surprise.” Dex smiles and ruffles Hayley and Julia’s hair. “Alright, time to get ready for school.” They take persuading, but eventually it’s just Nursey and Emma on his bed. His phone chimes and he sees an incoming Facetime call from Chowder.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY NURSEY!” He shouts into the phone. Nursey can tell by the background he is in the hallway of a hotel.

“Thanks man. Isn’t it like 4 am in Vegas?”

“I wanted to catch you when you woke up so I set an alarm.” Nursey’s heart warms. “How is being 23?”

“So far not to bad.” He gives Emma a tickle so she stops trying to take the phone away from him.

“Ow-der!”

“Hi Emma. I miss you!”

“Hey, did you know Dex was taking off work today?” 

“Maybe!” 

“What’s he got planned?” 

“Dex? With a plan?” Chowder’s so bad at sarcasm it’s even more comical than it would be if he decent. “Anyway, I should get back to bed. But enjoy your day! Send me snaps!” He ends the call and Nursey looks at Emma. 

“What is your brother up to today?” She answers him with a giggle and flops on his lap.

\--

“Where are we going?”

“It’s a surprise.”

“You don’t like surprises.”

“I don’t like surprises happening to _me_. I don’t mind planning them for others. Remember Bitty’s oven?”

“That was a great day.”

They are in the Explorer heading north on 95 for a while and Dex reluctantly gives him the aux cord. Emma happily coos to herself from the backseat.

“Is this your ‘drive and chill’ playlist?” Dex asks when Houndmouth comes on.

“How did you know that?” Nursey glances over at Dex, who only slightly flushes when he shrugs. “Uh, yeah it is.” They take the exit for highway 93. “Are we going to Boston?”

“We are.” Dex smiles. Nursey starts to guess places: Samwell (“ _nope_ ”), a museum (“ _dear god no_ ”), a Bruins game (“ _Emma is in the backseat and it’s 11 am_ ”). 

Dex navigates the streets of the South End better than Nursey remembers and they park in a small lot. Dex unloads the stroller and Nursey bundles up Emma in extra layers and a Falconers blanket. It takes almost a block for Nursey to recognize the neighborhood.

“Dex.” They stop in front of a small but well kept building. It’s his favorite Pho place, the one he dragged Dex to in the middle of a snowstorm their sophomore year (“ _What do you mean you never had Pho???”)._ Dex shrugs. 

“You said it was the best Pho you’ve ever had. And we don’t get to eat at restaurants often.” Nursey doesn’t say anything, he can’t even really move because he’s feeling a hundred different things at one. “Come on,” Dex claps a hand on his shoulder and leads him to the doorway. “It’s cold out.” 

Pho has always been a comfort food of his but today he knows the warmth is from so much more than the steaming broth. Emma sits in the stroller eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich while he and Dex talk about everything from hockey to the girls to that rabbit that won’t leave their back porch. 

Halfway through lunch Emma starts to get antsy and Dex puts her on his lap. 

“Hockey bus! Hockey bus!” She points at the diaper bag and Dex rolls his eyes. 

“On the list of things never to forgive Ransom and Holster for, this one is at the top.” 

“Over giving Hayles and Jules nerf guns?”

“This one is personal.” Dex takes out the book and Emma immediately grabs it.

“Nursey read.” She starts to wiggle out of his grasp and Nursey holds out his arms. 

“I do make the best voices.” He hears a snort from Dex but opens the book to page one.

Ransom and Holster had apparently gotten drunk and creative one weekend and went on a website where you can customize a children’s book. The book was meant to be sung to the tune of “The Wheels On The Bus”, except this version was called “The Hockey Team Bus” and featured verses for each Samwell player. Nursey had to admit the lyrics were creative and the little cartoon drawings were spot on, but after reading the book twice a day to Emma, lyrics like ‘ _the Jack on the bus says eat more protein_ ’ gets old.

She starts to nod off through the second round of reading and Nursey gently lays her in the stroller.

“No fighting the nap today.” Dex remarks with a smile.

“Happy Birthday to me.” Nursey finishes the last of his soup and sits back in the chair. Two girls who looked around their age walked up to their table with bright smiles.

“Sorry, we just wanted to let you guys know you’re a really cute couple and your daughter is so cute.”

“Oh, uh…” Nursey trails off awkwardly.  

“Thank you.” Dex answers and Nursey snaps his head to look over at him. The girls leave and Dex laughs at Nursey’s bewildered expression.

“You really want to go into the whole dead parents, adopted sisters, best friends helping raise them thing?” 

“I guess not.” Nurse agrees but the whole drive him he can’t stop thinking that there are apparently people in the world who think he and Dex are _married_ and have a _child_. He doesn’t find the idea terrible at all.

“Should we head to the bus stop to wait for Hayley and Julia?” Nursey asks when they turn on their street. 

“Let’s change Emma’s diaper first.” They get her out of the carseat and walk up the front steps. Nursey frowns when he finds the door already unlocked and pushes it open carefully--

“SURPRISE!”

The living room is decorated with streamers and balloons are scattered all over. Bitty is there with a bright purple party had on and Hayley and Julia throw confetti into the air when Nursey walks in. There’s a banner that says “ _Happy Birthday Nursey_!” and he can see three giant presents on the coffee table.

He’s speechless and he knows his mouth is hanging open and if it wasn’t his birthday Dex would probably tease him for looking like a guppie, but instead he feels a firm hand against his upper back.

“Happy Birthday Nursey.”

“I…” tears start to prick at the corner of his eyes.

“Come see your presents!” Hayley grabs one of his hands and tugs him into the living room.

“Do you like our banner?” Julia points to the wall and Nursey takes a minute to admire it. All of the Y’s are backwards and there are flower stickers and a pound of glitter covering it. He never wants to take it down. 

“It’s incredible! How did you girls decorate so fast?”

“Bitty picked us up from school _early_.” Hayley wiggles her eyebrows.

“There girls are great party planners, we are forming a committee for Jack and I’s Fourth of July party.” Bitty envelops Nursey in a warm hug. “You okay?”

“Shocked.” He answered, knowing Bitty understands. 

“Presents!” Hayley pushes a large box towards him.

“Let him breathe for a minute,” Dex puts Emma down and she immediately beelines for a balloon.

Nursey opens a new Falconers sweatshirt from Chowder and a leather notebook and gorgeous pens from Bitty and Jack, but his favorite present is from Dex and the girls. Three pictures in beautiful frames: one of Nursey and Hayley during a shinny face off, one of him and Julia having a tea party in the kitchen and the one of him and Emma fast asleep on the couch. Bitty records the entire thing, per Chowder’s request.

“This is….really amazing.” Nursey’s throat is dry and he sort of feels like he might tear up again. Hayley and Julia also made him homemade cards, complete with crayon drawings of them together and even more glitter. Bitty smiles.

“I’ve got a baked ziti in the oven, just have to throw the garlic bread in and toss a salad.”

“I’ll help you set the table.” Dex stands up. “Want a beer, birthday boy?” Nursey nods, still in a little bit of a daze.

The Falconers-Aces game starts at 6:00 east coast time and they all crowd on the couch sporting various Falconers gear and eating chocolate pudding pie. Hayley and Julia decorate Nursey’s arm with the temporary tattoos they got from the book fair.

“That might be the first sleeve that features Paw Patrol, Disney princesses and the Avengers.” Dex inspects their work during a commercial break. 

“And emojis.” Hayley points to a corner featuring the heart eyes, ghost and poop emojis. Dex bursts out laughing, making Nursey’s already amazing day get even better. 

The girls show him the valentines cards they got from school during commercials and the Falconers beat the Aces in overtime. Dex sends the picture of Nursey’s sleeve to the group chat and everyone chirps him for it. He can’t stop smiling.

Bitty puts Emma to bed and only leaves after giving Nursey two more hugs. Dex sends the girls up to brush their teeth and put on pajamas and Nursey tries to help him clear the plates from the coffee table.

“You don’t need to clean up Nurse, it’s your birthday.” 

“I don’t mind.” It’s the least he can do. They work together easily, not needing words to communicate. From hockey to loading a dishwasher, they just always seemed to click. 

“ _Nursey_!” Hayley’s voice calls down the stairs and Dex throws his hands up, muttering about a sleeping baby. “ _We want_ you _to read our bedtime story_!”

“Okay!” Nursey goes for a shout-whisper, but Dex’s eye roll probably means he was not successful. He puts the last fork in the dishwasher and turns to Dex. “Dex, today was...the best birthday ever.” 

“Even more than your twenty-first when Tango almost got arrested?”

“Even then.” Nursey smiles. He should leave, go upstairs and tuck the girls in, but there’s something else he needs to say. “I mean Dex, my parents…” Dex’s expression shifts from amusement to a concerned. “They didn’t even call.” 

Dex has that look, the one he used to get right before he dropped his gloves in a hockey game.

“That’s fucked up.”

“You know they never really call-“

“And it’s fucked up every single time they don’t.” The tips of Dex’s ears are turning red now.

“Yeah.” It’s strange to see someone get so worked up about it when Nursey accepted his parents’ ways years ago. “But anyway, thank you for today. Like, you really didn’t have to go all out like that.”

“You are a part of this family.” It’s Dex’s ‘no arguments, no backtalk’ voice, the one that drove Nursey crazy their frog year. “So get used to it. Poindexters like their birthday celebrations.” 

“Aye, aye cap.” Nursey gives him a lazy salute and Dex gives him the finger and Nursey thinks Blink 182 was wrong all of these yeas: 23 isn’t so bad at all.

\--

The Falconers Family Playgroup is one of the best things that happened to Derek Nurse.

It gets him and Emma out of the house, lets her run around with kids her own age and Nursey gets the best gossip (which he always shares with Dex while they are getting ready for bed. Dex is a secret deets-lover.) 

Today is a smaller group, just Nursey, Gabby St. Martin and Carrie Robinson and they drink coffee at the large table in Gabby’s kitchen. Gabby’s youngest son Leo and Emma are about the same age and became quick friends. Carrie has a new baby girl, Malia, wrapped in blankets and fast asleep in her arms.

“I’m telling you, when you’re the youngest of four kids, you just learn to sleep through anything. Randall came in last night carrying on about a Lego he stepped on and this kid slept through his daddy’s dramatics.” Nursey leans over and smiles at the baby.

“I have watched Sebastian get checked into the boards for fifteen years and yet I’ve never seen him as distraught as when he tripped over tickle me Elmo.” Gabby laughs. Nursey glances at the kitchen floor and watches Emma nearly knock over one of Leo’s carefully crafted block towers. Balance was not her thing either.

“So Derek,” Carrie starts. He looks up and sees her exchange a quick look with Gabby before turning her attention back to him. “I have to ask you something, and I don’t want to pry, but it’s only because I have a gorgeous cousin who I’d love to set you up with but I wasn’t sure…” she trails off and Nursey takes another sip of coffee. “Are you and Will dating?”

He immediately starts choking on the coffee and it takes two full minutes before he can calm down and sputter out an answer.

“Us? Dating? Ha, no. _No_. We aren’t. At all.” _So not chill._ It’s quiet for a minute.

“Oh _honey_.” Gabby reaches out and places a soft hand on top of his and Carrie lets out a low whistle. Nursey opens his mouth to correct them, but finds that he doesn’t actually want to. He probably wouldn’t have convinced them anyway.   

“It’s really okay.” He puts on his best ‘it’s fine’ smile, the one he has used less and less since his Andover days. Carrie doesn’t buy it.

“Have you told him? Maybe he feels the same way.”

“He doesn’t.” Nursey remembers when Dex came out to him in their junior year, how nervous he was and how Nursey was shocked he told him first. Nursey had liked him for a while (though god knows he tried not to) but it was that day he decided he wouldn’t do anything to ruin their friendship because Dex’s trust was worth too much to him. And that included confessing his big old crush. “He needs me for the girls right now.”

“So you’re just going to ignore your feelings?” 

“The girls come first for me too.” And it was true. He always adored the Poindexter girls when they would visit Samwell or he would make the drive up to Maine, but helping raise them has made him experience a whole new kind of love. He and Chowder were as fiercely protective of them as Dex was. He wouldn’t risk upsetting that. 

“Well if you ever need anything,” Gabby gives his hand another squeeze. “We are always here. I haven’t lived on this earth for forty years without pining after a few boys myself.” 

“Oh god, there was this girl in college.” Carrie starts fanning herself and Nursey laughs. “She was on the swim team and I swear, even if I saw her now I would probably faint. That girl had legs that went on for _weeks_.”

Emma sends Leo’s block tower crashing to the ground and the crying children put a stop to the conversations of what might have been.

\--

“I can’t find the card!” Hayley thunders down the stairs.

“Where did you last have it?” Nursey spent the better part of his Saturday morning wrestling with wrapping the present and he really hopes he didn’t wrap the card up with it.

“I don’t know! Maybe I just shouldn’t go.”

“I thought you liked Madison?” Chowder frowns and Hayley shrugs.

“I’m only invited because all of the girls in our class were. Everyone thinks I’m weird.”

“What?” Nursey and Chowder both kneel down so they can be eye level.

“I talk weird and I’m a girl that plays hockey and I don’t have parents.” She says the last part softly and stares at the ground. Chowder looks to Nursey with wide eyes and Nursey pulls on Hayley’s hand.

“Hey. You’re not weird. Your life is just a little different, that’s all.”

“And being different is okay,” Chowder gives her a small smile. “It just means you have fun stories to tell.”

“Really?” She asks.

“Promise.” He holds out his arms for a hug and she jumps into them.

“Thanks Chowder,” she whispers against his shoulder. Chowder almost looks like he will burst into tears in the best way possible and Nursey can’t even chirp him because he knows exactly what that feels like.

When Hayley runs to the back porch to give Dex a hug goodbye before Chowder drops her off at the party, Nursey just gives him a fistbump and a smile.

“Nursey, Will says he needs help hanging the porch swing up. It’s finally done!”

“Swawesome. Have fun at the party Hayles. I f you need us, just call, okay?” She nods and gives him a quick hug before they head out the door, promising to stop at the pharmacy for another card.

It’s an unseasonably warm day for early March and Nursey only needs a pullover on top of his sweater. Because some higher power is seriously out to get him, Dex’s wears an unbuttoned flannel that reveals a tight navy henley shirt.

“Don’t worry Nurse, I’m not gonna make you use tools,” Dex says with a smile, mistaking Nursey’s expression for fear of the powerdrill in his hand. “I just need to finish this hook and then we can lift the swing from the garage and carry it over here.”

“Chill.” When they go into the garage to get the swing, Nursey lets out a low whistle. “Shit, Poindexter this looks really good.”

“Yeah?” A nd Nursey knows Dex is modest, he takes checks ten times easier than compliments and Nursey should tread carefully. But he can’t help it: he gushes.

“Man, you _built_ this. In the garage! While raising three crazy girls and working crazy hours at your job!” Dex is full on blushing now but Nursey is still shaking his head in disbelief.

“It wasn’t that bad. Come on, you get the left side.”

They carry it from the garage to the back porch without any injuries and Nursey only stumbles once. Dex shows him where to hoist the chains so they go through the metal hooks hanging from the porch roof. Then he fastens the chains to the swing and adjusts them so they click together.

“Should we try it out?” Nursey asks tentatively. Dex shrugs.

“Better us falling on our asses if it doesn’t work than the girls.”

They don’t fall on their asses. The swing is sturdy and the poet in Nursey can’t help but note the similarities to its maker. They sit close, closer than they have to, but Nursey justifies it’s because the wind started to pick up.

“I think we should go somewhere this summer. For a week maybe.” Dex is staring at the one patch of snow left in the backyard, by the part of the fence that always casts a shadow.

“Chowder’s pushing for Disney.”

“I’m not going to Disney until Emma is potty trained. T hat trip will be insane enough without me luggin’ a diaper bag around.”

“I could hold the diaper bag.” Dex turns to look at Nursey and rolls his eyes.  

“You’ll be too busy holding the crap that you buy the girls. You know you’ll cave and we will come home with ten new costumes.” He’s not wrong.

“Chow will be worse.” Dex hums in agreement. “A week away sounds nice though.” _Does he offer his parent’s house in the Hamptons or is that stepping over one of those money lines he’s tried to learn over the past five years?_

“Just an idea.” Dex is still looking at him and Nursey blames the way the afternoon light catches the gold flecks in his amber eyes for what he says next.

“Well if it’s your idea it’s always a good one.” There’s not a hint of sarcasm in his voice, if anything it’s too soft, too full of the emotion he has tried to ignore. The left corner of Dex’s lip curves up and he lightly shakes his head.

“You have too much faith in me Nurse.”

“Well,” Nursey says softly. “You haven’t proven me wrong yet.”

Nursey learned about units of measurement in school, how a centimeter was smaller than a meter and a millimeter was the smallest. It’s millimeter by millimeter that Dex’s head moves forward and Nursey slowly parts his lips, knowing what’s coming and still not believing it—

“I finished my sand art!” The back door swings open and Dex and Nursey spring apart to opposite sides of the swing. “I want to come up!” Julia stands in front of them holding a plastic bunny with various layers of colored sand in it. Dex gets down and lifts her up, placing her next to Nursey.

“I’m gonna, uh, check on Emma, see if she’s still napping.” Dex reaches a hand back and rubs the back of his neck. There’s a flush there that _Nursey_ put there and the thought leaves him breathless.

“Yeah. Okay.”

“Nursey, my sandart!” And his view of watching Dex walk always is obstructed by a plastic rabbit.

“That looks really good, Jules.”

“Thank you. Can we swing?” She snuggles into his side. He nods and starts to move his legs so the swing shifts back and forth. They are quiet for a minute (a record for Julia, really) before she speaks up. “Whatcha thinking about?”

“A poem I once read.”

“Can you tell me?”

“Sure,” he wraps an arm around her and smiles. “ _So since I’m still here livin’, I guess I will live on._ _I could've died for love, but for livin' I was born_.”

 

\--

_!!!!!!_

_Please don't kill me. I promise a big romantic moment that will put the romcoms to shame is coming up soon!!_

_The poem Nursey thinks of after they teach Emma to skate is Ella Wheeler Wilcox “A Song of Life” and the last line is from Langston Hughes “life is fine”_

_(for your enjoyment) The full lyrics to “The Hockey Team Bus”_

_The hockey team bus has lots of players, lots of players, lots of players_

_The hockey team bus has lots of players, and they’ll win the game!_

_The Jack on the bus says eat more protein_

_Uncle S on the bus says women are great_

_The Lardo on the bus says put on pants_

_The Ransom on the bus says kegster later!_

_The Holster on the bus sings all the songs_

_The Bitty on the bus says I’ve got pie_

_The Nursey on the bus says yo dude chill_

_The Dex on the bus says please shut up_

_The Chowder on the bus says I love Samwell_

**Author's Note:**

> I'm over on tumblr fangirling over fictional (and occasionally real) hockey players at starks-and-mellarks


End file.
